Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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victoria2014 09/25/2018

How do I begin?

Well, I did put myself out there to see if I can even really move forward.

After several emails and chatting on line I have finally felt the chemistry with someone. So charming, so understanding, so undeniably unreal.

After four weeks of chatting, he have showed his true color. Very convincing, very slick pleading of sob story. Of course I am not no dummy and recognized that he was trying to scammed me.

All though I was little disappointed at the fact it turned out the way it did, but I’ve learned that, yes there is hope and I can move on with a right person.

It actually did move me from that invisible line I was so afraid to cross... and I know now, I can cross it and be happy again. And by crossing it, it really is what I can do to honor my late husband’s death and his existence within my heart forever.

Happyness is truly within, I am happy with or without anyone to rely on. My happiness will enhance if I have someone to share, but I am happy with where I am, with or without that person.

Allthough I enjoyed it very much while it lasted, I’ve never knew that those feelings exisited within me. And I am glad of experience that and strong enough to not have my heart broken, but rather appreciate the venue this scam artist had laid out for me, to walk on. After all, what other things can break my heart after loosing a my spouse? I am not going to lie, it was an amazing feeling of let go, let in and freeing myself from the sorrow I was in, for the last 19 months.

I am sorry for all of us who are here...but I like all of you to know that there is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there!

What an experience! Cease the moment, we all going to be alright.

Hugs

raininseattle 09/25/2018

Rather than the title Loss, Found and Loss, it is really your own discovery process. You are much stronger than you thought you would be. You also experienced and saw through a scam artist, so that in itself will build confidence as well.

lmj90 10/02/2018

It truly is a million things to consider when looking to move forward. I am sorry you had a bad experience but glad you found some insight into your feelings. I think we all have those times when we wonder if parts of us still exist. I certainly do. I remember a year ago meeting a co worker for the first time. I was his supervisor and he came to work in my building. He was so attractive, so smart, so kind. I just couldn't believe that I had seen him in that way from the first encounter. I didn't know I still had the ability to feel attraction. It was scary. I haven't acted on anything even though I no longer work with him. I am so afraid of loosing again. its such a mix of emotions. Hugs to you.

babochka 10/02/2018

Bravo, Victoria! Not only you spotted a scammer on time, but you did not let yourself to break over it,. Moreover, you realized, that it was a useful experience and that you are capable of feeling that "spark" again, to be a woman again, to live life again.
Me, too I went through a scammer before I met my new love. I spent three months on someone from France whose goal was to break me financially (luckily, he was unsuccessful). Did I waste those 3 months? Hell no! My French improved greatly thanks to him. I re-learned the art of seduction. Plus, now I know a lot about online scammers, and could recognize them right away.
I believe in you, Victoria. You are a smart and courageous. And you are ready for meeting that Special One. May he be sent your way soon.

shewearsblack17 10/06/2018

If the scammer goes by the name Jerry Cruise, run. It's actually a big group.

Renie 10/07/2018

Thanks everyone for sharing your valuable insights. Maybe I am wrong but I do not like to tell anyone that I am a widow when asked about my status. I feel like there are people out there trying to take advantage of us. I had one instance and now find myself being extra careful. Life is hard now without my hubby and people like this make things worse. Thank you again.

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