Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

life sucks

KR17
KR17

I am new to the group - it has been one year since my husband passed unexpectedly - we were married 23 years- I am the mother of 2 boys - For some reason I thought if I made it to the year mark things would magically get better - like some miracle I wake up with my love next to me and the past year was just a really bad nightmare. I am so lonely - he was my best friend - my world and never realized everything he did (still trying to get  my taxes figured out) wish I wouldn't have listened when he would talk about it but I thought what do I need to know about that - he will take care of it - I feel so lost and lonely - the only thing I can do is take one day at a time.

luckydaughter
luckydaughter
Hi KR17. First of all, let me say I am so sorry about your loss. I think a lot of people do think and talk like the one year mark is magical and I am sure that it is not. (I have only been a widow for 5 months so I can't speak from personal experience yet.)

One thing I am learning is that I cannot do everything he did and I am sure he could not do everything I did, either. Although I am learning quickly how to do a lot of new things, there are some things I need help with. Is there someone that can help you with the taxes? Even if you have to pay money, it might be worth it for the peace of mind of getting them done right.

Take care.

Sylvia
KR17
KR17
Sorry for you loss as well - I have been working with my tax guy all year - my husband started my company which I have no idea what to pay quarterly or who - my tax guy says it will all be straighten out (have been with him for years) but it is frustrating getting irs bills in the mail and not knowing what to pay - told him I can't go though another year being stressed about this - too many other things to worry about - Thank you Sylvia - its nice to hear from someone who understands since they are going through the same types of issues
jdp
jdp
It has been 3 years for me. I realized, I had to assume responsibilities that had been shared before. Some I could handle, some I had to get help. It's ok to ask others for referrals, I am still doing that. Things continue to need replaced, repaired around the house especially.

You are wise to take one day @ a time.
jdp
KR17
KR17
Thanks jdp - it is overwelming - we also have a duplex that we own that is an hour away had to evict the tenents - they destroyed my property - had to sink so much money in it - everything my husband took care of - just praying that it sells and I will have one less thing to worry about.