Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

Life Even After

praised
praised
It has been fourteen months since my husband passed away from Lung Cancer.. I have seen many changes as we all have. I have done renovations in our home and in the yard he loved so much. I donated his 2007 Nissan Sentra to the American Lung Association and kept my old 1998 Nissan Altima. I thought at the time it was in better shape with only 63,000 miles. Well, after all the money spent on the house, I am preparing to buy a car. I knew it was only a matter of time, but I thought "just one more year" so I could save. Last night I was experiencing chest pains and I prayed for healing. I didn't want to tell my daughters and I didn't want to go to the emergency room at 1 am. So I fell asleep. I really believe it was stress because as with all of us widows, the total responsibility is on us, which adds to the grief. I am grateful that I have the resources, but if you had a loved one like mine, he spoiled me and I miss that so much. Sometimes I call out his name and sometimes I answer for him. I pray for all of us that our pain will lessen as time goes on and that we live each day to the fullest.
gerald222
gerald222
I join you in your prayers for all of us. God bless. Gerry
SandyV1
SandyV1
Wishing you all the very best. Hugs. Sandy
Rainbow27
Rainbow27
Praised, I do hope you are feeling better. yes, the words are so true
"the responsibility is on us." Your husband sounded super kind and I love your comment you answer for him. I also miss my wonderful husband and woke up this morning with tears running down my eyes. Much peace today,
marysch
marysch
Such a beautiful post...thank you...what all of us feel, I'm sure
Coop84
Coop84
Praised, I hope you have not had any more chest pains. Yes, the stress of it all is very hard on our bodies. My husband also spoiled me too!! Sending healing hugs!! Sue
deleted_user
deleted_user
I understand my husband was the world to me and spoiled me in the little ways that counted. We will make it, we will find the strength and pray for each other to get through the days and nights that lay ahead.

I read this maybe it will help you: Grief, you must go through it, not around it. Each step you take is a part of healing.
soalone2to1
soalone2to1
Yes now it's all on us. I get overwhelmed just thinking of all the little things I now have to deal with. Winterize the sprinklers, change the water filters, fill the water softener w/salt just to name a few. Don't know how to do any of these things , but no money to pay someone to do all this. Life is scarey, lonely, depressing, empty and filled with problems. Oh yeah and try to work too. Roy made it all look so easy. He just knew how to do everything. I am just realizing that I trusted him completely and that I don't trust anyone else like that. I feel others even so called friends will take advantage of me because I am in a bad way and am desperate for help. This is no way to have to live for the rest of my days. Just wish I knew the plan. So afraid I will get sick or die and not get things finished and in order before . I just worry all day every day until I am exhausted enough to sleep. Sorry this is so long.
goldenearrings
goldenearrings
Thanks for prayers and back at you.................hope you are feeling better...........I remember going to the er with chest pains not long after my love passed............stress.........will be 5 yrs this Christmas...............today I am having a very hard day.....our Anniversary and Norm's birthday are in Oct. and this is our favorite time of year.................has gotten better but there are days it socks you in the gut again.......this is one.............. I am hanging on to my 2001 car as long as possible............I was also spoiled............was soooo great..Lori
Livingbyfaith
Livingbyfaith
darn, does it ever get better? I relate to everything you said coping keeps me busy which is good. When not busy I miss him so much. Grandson said today his gpa appeared to him saying Boy!! So like hubby got me teary eyed Last week I missed him so much and called out to him, during the night I awoke to see a shadow of a person leaning over me and the dog in bed, so like him. Oh I laugh, enjoy life but there is a big hole in my heart. God bless us all.
praised
praised
Well I did it. Today I drove my 1998 Nissan to the dealer and drove out with a 2013 Certified Used Car. Sitting there by myself negotiating and missing my husband being my support was very hard. Yet, It is one of many situations we will deal with in the days, months and years to come. I continue to pray for all of us because prayer works.