Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Just waiting?

Rokababy05
Rokababy05

Waiting for time to "Pass". Waiting for it to get easier.  Lost My Dear Husband January, 29 this year. Everyone says it will get better with time, waiting for it.

Lielie
Lielie
I think better is not the best word, but dlearning to cope, learning to live with the hole in your heart, that is what i pray for. Hugs and strength to you
Msbklyn
Msbklyn
It's true by better I think most people will mean less acute. The pain of the first months especially does eventually subside gradually. You find yourself having an ok day and then maybe a good day where you are not crying most of the time. I know in the beginning I barely cried at all I think I was numb. Then I tried staying very busy. I find it's best just to get through one day at a time and if it's a bad one I hope the next day is not as bad. After 19 months I am building my life reluctantly without my husband but feeling ok a lot of the time. Try to take it day by day and find some things that make you feel good. I wish you peace.
vwidow
vwidow
Msbklyn that's nice advice, and it's graciously and truthfully and sadly put to say "reluctantly."
Roka my husband died the day after yours. I wonder the same things everyday. I talked to a widow yest erday whose husband's been gone 13 yrs. I asked her if it really changes and she said not really. But she seemed adjusted and was busy.
AAA236
AAA236
I believe we will carry our loss with us 'til the end but it does become "easier." Like Msbklyn said you will find yourself having better days mixed in with bad days, but there will be more of the better. Prior to this week, I went 2 weeks, 2 WHOLE WEEKS without crying. I was having a much more positive outlook on life, going out for walks and being more motivated to do things. This week that all changed : ( but I have accepted that I will be riding this rollercoaster for some time.
Btlcrzr
Btlcrzr
Lost my hubby of 44 yrs. 2 mos.ago this year.i have more bad days than good days.but at least i am able to go to work.the hardest part is at he end of the day you are alone,and the person that you share every little things is no longer there to tell you it will be ok,things will work out.but theres hope that you and i will be. Able to go on for a while untill its time to join your other half.light and hope to you
Marie44
Marie44
When my husband first died I felt a thousand stabs to the heart each day. Now 15 months later it's probably down to 500 but they don't go quite as deep as the early days.