Dear Pat,

I am so very sorry for your loss. When we loose a husband suddenly, it is so devistating, and can shake our world completely. I know this since I too lost my husband in an instant 10 months ago when he went into cardiac arrest.

For you, the feelings are still very raw and fresh. Be gentle and and take care of yourself. I found that coming here to DS and letting out my feelings and asking for help was so helpful. If you can, join a grief support group too, and I found that reading books on grief was helpful. There is one called SEVEN CHOICES that was particularly good.

I was unable to sleep, and came to the computer and saw your message. Come back here as often as you want.

Sending you a big hug,
lespreludes

Wendy, I am so sorry for you and your daughters on the loss of your husband. My husband passed away 7 months ago and I still cry every day & every night & the last place I want to be is at work. I just feell ike I cannot function. Just take one day at a time = we have a long journey ahead of us. No reason to hurry- there is no time frame on grief and we all grieve differently. I am glad you are going to one on one counselling. I went & I was really doing great - well, guess what, I am going back. I stopped too soon. I am also starting to attend a grief support group the beginning of May & am really looking forward to it. I have found the ones who have been through this are the most understanding & helpful. How old are your daughters? I am sure you will find comfort & a lot of help on this website. You said about crying - my counselor said it is best to cry & get it out! Your family will be in my prayers. CHERI

I am so sorry for your loss. May 5 will be a year since I lost my husband. Someone on here had mentioned a book A TIME TO GRIEVE it helps me.

I am so sorry for your loss. Just keep coming here to talk to everyone. You will get support here. Also, if you can join a grief-support group where you can actually talk to others, that might help too.

Hi Pat,
So very sorry for your recent loss. I know how you are feeling because I lost my husband and very best friend 13 months ago.
It was very sudden. We had spoken on the phone, laughing and discussing our weekend. One hour later, I was notified that he was gone. He died of a massive heart attack.
Even after 13 months, I can honestly say I still feel the pain every day.
The lonliness can get unbearable, but you have to realize that this is just an "absence" and that one day we will reunite with our "angels" again.
I totally believe in this and it is what has helped me get through this far.
If you ever "need" to talk, feel free to message me!
Love to you, Mo

You have come to the place that will help you more than know right now. I found this site two weeks after my husband passed away in Nov. 2009. It helped me understand all the feelings I was having. That I wasn't going crazy...and when I needed someone just to get comfort or support this site is here. I haven't found anyone outside of this site that I can really talk to except my daughter and even then sometimes I feel I go on to much....so we are here to help you through this horrible journey of grief and the ups and downs it all brings...hugs Ellen

I am so sorry for you loss. Today starts the 36th week since I lost my DH. Some days are better then others, then some days are horrendous! Take care.

Hi Wendy - I am so sorry for your loss. You have definitely come to the right place for help and support. I lost my husband 6 weeks ago today and it has been a nightmare. I probably would have totally lost my mind had it not been for DS and my family too of course. But DS provides the place where I can say absolutely anything and there is always, ALWAYS someone who understands. At times, I have been afraid or ashamed to post some thought, but after I do, someone always offers me comfort, support, and most of all understanding.

It is a powerful thing just to be understood. The real life people we meet who really understand are few and far between. So, please continue to use DS - vent, cry, gripe, reflect, remember, whatever it is you need to do - and we will be here for you.
Best wishes to you.

I'm so very sorry for your loss, Wendy, but glad that you already knew about this site and could come to us right away for what support we can give. It's mainly empathy, understanding, and experience that I'm finding here. Nobody can change your reality, but we can share it with you and that does seem to help.

All the very best to you.

Hugs, Gail

I am so sorry for your loss. This is a good group of people - caring, supportive, and understanding. We are here for you; you are not alone. laurabp

Thanks for all your support. Our daughters are 26 and 28, both have wonderful men, one married, one's BF asked Pat for her hand and even tho he was sedated we are sure he gave his blessing and would be so happy for them. I honestly think he made it thru a 7+ hour surgery that should have been 2 - 21/2 hours so we could say good bye. He never ever complained and he had so many health issues. Also never missed work. Wendy

He sounds like a remarkable man. I'm glad that you had the chance to say good-bye to him.

I am so sorry for your loss, but also wanted to welcome you to the group.

Love and Hugs, Martha

Very sorry to hear about your loss. Please know you are not alone.
My husband also suddenly passed away about one year ago. I joined a grief group of wonderful people and they have made my life bearable. This has been a very difficult year but I do see a light at the end of the tunnel now.. You may be able to locate a group with your local Hospice Care.

My heart goes out to you. This grief is consuming. Please try to get some sleep when you can, try to eat, lean on your support system and take it day by day. Glad you are here on this site. I am so sorry.
Hugs, Donna