Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I am blessed in so many ways- good friends and a lot of faith that everything will be okay, even better than okay... If I just keep trying to trudge through the days I don't feel like going on...
Just last Saturday- I was in horrible shape. I was isolating myself- I felt alone even with people- so why not? I told my sister that I had no will to go on... And that only my granddaughter and my fear of what would happen to my soul if I ended it was keeping me here. Easter Sunday I fully intended to spend the day alone, and canceled plans to pick up my Grand and have dinner with my sister. I was in a horrible funk. That is when I created the post "I'm crabby."
Sunday evening my sister talked me into picking up my granddaughter and coming over- even though it was much later than we had planned. And something started changing for me...
I am starting to feel his presence again. Please don't think I am crazy (though maybe I am.). But yesterday, I was driving with granddaughter in the back seat... And I could have sworn he held my hand for a few moments.
I have been feeling him with me a little more each day this week. And not only that... I am feeling some hope for the future. It is hard to explain- but suddenly things don't seem nearly as bleak.
I look for a reason why this may be happening now and for me- and all I can come up with is that maybe someone has been praying extra hard for me. I am not special- I deserve this respite from the grief no more than you do...so why else, suddenly, would I be feeling so different?
I don't expect this will last- but I wanted to share that, at least for me, there has been an oasis in the desert of grief. And since prayer is the only answer I can come up with for why this is happening- I will make sure I include you all in my prayers.
One more thing, the dastardly SIL has been in contact. She is going to allow me to get at least some of Bernie's things from the farm tomorrow AM. Maybe I was wrong about her too.
Suddenly I don't feel so crabby anymore. Thank you to friends who held me up in prayer. Thank you Bernie, for keeping a watchful eye on me even though the pleasures of being free from your body must be tempting you to become distracted. And above all, Thank you God, for blessing me with the folks mentioned above.
Feeling Loved Beyond Measure- and Praying The Same For You!
Just last Saturday- I was in horrible shape. I was isolating myself- I felt alone even with people- so why not? I told my sister that I had no will to go on... And that only my granddaughter and my fear of what would happen to my soul if I ended it was keeping me here. Easter Sunday I fully intended to spend the day alone, and canceled plans to pick up my Grand and have dinner with my sister. I was in a horrible funk. That is when I created the post "I'm crabby."
Sunday evening my sister talked me into picking up my granddaughter and coming over- even though it was much later than we had planned. And something started changing for me...
I am starting to feel his presence again. Please don't think I am crazy (though maybe I am.). But yesterday, I was driving with granddaughter in the back seat... And I could have sworn he held my hand for a few moments.
I have been feeling him with me a little more each day this week. And not only that... I am feeling some hope for the future. It is hard to explain- but suddenly things don't seem nearly as bleak.
I look for a reason why this may be happening now and for me- and all I can come up with is that maybe someone has been praying extra hard for me. I am not special- I deserve this respite from the grief no more than you do...so why else, suddenly, would I be feeling so different?
I don't expect this will last- but I wanted to share that, at least for me, there has been an oasis in the desert of grief. And since prayer is the only answer I can come up with for why this is happening- I will make sure I include you all in my prayers.
One more thing, the dastardly SIL has been in contact. She is going to allow me to get at least some of Bernie's things from the farm tomorrow AM. Maybe I was wrong about her too.
Suddenly I don't feel so crabby anymore. Thank you to friends who held me up in prayer. Thank you Bernie, for keeping a watchful eye on me even though the pleasures of being free from your body must be tempting you to become distracted. And above all, Thank you God, for blessing me with the folks mentioned above.
Feeling Loved Beyond Measure- and Praying The Same For You!
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Old Hillbilly Wisdom:Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.Keep skunks, bankers, and politicians at a distance.Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.The best sermons are lived, not preached.If you don't take the time to do it right, you'll find the...
As far as being watched over and protected...something tells me Bernie is the one responsible for that!
Faith what you wrote perfectly describes what I was feeling in the begining of the week. As the days went by the darkness started to lift to give me like you said a respit. Like you I know the battel will start again but I know in the end we will all come together again. I will also continue to keep praying over us all. Your right someone was praying over you. I can feel it to, especially here.
Peace, Tim
Keep looking for blessings my friends. When you are looking the world seems full of them!