Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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heartache1 06/23/2018

I lost my Gus in February 2018 and have been looking all over the internet just to tell someone how I feel. But honesrly I don't know. Four months today and everything is numb. My whole body hurts, I cry everyday. I have trouble everyday going back to my house after work. I dont like it here anymore, its lonely and gloomy. I live out of my car as I go from my house to my daughter's homes. But I can't rely on them, they have their own lives and shouldnt have to take care of their mom, afterall that was Gus' and my plan. Now, I dont know what my plan is. I didn't make alot of friends here, he did but not me. He could make friends with everybody. We have only lived here for 3 years. My daughter lives in my other house in another state. I am just waiting for what she wants to do ( move out, marry or live in the same state as me) before I sell or manage that house. I feel like I have this big giant size weight on my shoulders, but I cant even stay up past 8pm, cause I'm so sad. I lay in bed and cry myself to sleep. I dont want to keep going. I dont want to get out of bed in the morning, I do, but I dont want to. I dont know what to do next, I just dont know what to do.

regwin 06/23/2018

I'm so sorry. I feel for you. It's just a short time since you lost Gus. We all know how you feel and are here for you. Try to take one day at a time. I remember feeling just like you do. I didn't want to go back home after being out.
It will be better in time. Getting through grief takes time, Hope Hospice has a group that meets weekly. . You will find friendship and comfort there.. Try to take care of yourself by eating healthy foods. Take walks. The exercise outdoors will help. May Peace. be with you. Love and Hugs, Dolores

Msbklyn 06/26/2018

Hang in there. You may need support to help you get through this time, many churches and hospitals offer grief or bereavement groups. Taking one day, sometimes one moment at a time may work. I also took pottery classes, mosaic tile workshops, anything to keep myself busy. That type of activity was good for me. There is no one way just each day as it comes and over time You will get to a better place. We always miss them, it takes time and gentle patience to heal your soul. Come here, read old posts, you will see others who have done it and know you can. That's what I needed to know, that I could survive this devastation. And I have, and you will. We are here for you. God Bless Marybeth

Shrn 07/02/2018

So very sorry for your loss. I can understand. I detest evenings. Television wasn't holding my attention. Couldn't concentrate on a book. Since he died at home with hospice I moved our bedroom and made that a livingroom. Livingroom became my room. My nephew paints the room and I got new stuff to make it mine...I still missed him, but it helped a little. It was better than sitting next to his chair

papillon 07/03/2018

I also lost my husband of 53 years in February. The 6 month mark is coming up and there are moments grief overwhelms me. I joined a bereavement group at church and that seems to help but I've only gone a couple of times so I don't know if it's going to be helpful yet. This site is a good place to start. You can post how you feel and there's always someone that will give positive feedback. I've had to force myself to reach out to people I'm comfortable with to get together for lunch, dinner or movie. I start my day on my Kindle with positive input such as Our Daily Bread, Daily Guideposts, Chicken Soup for the Soul, Grieving and recovery. The readings are short and uplifting. I don't suppress my grief. I cry when I feel like it (which is often). Since you're still working maybe there's another woman feeling as lonely as you that you can make plans with. You'd be surprised. Being a widow is hard, being a lonely widow is harder. Take baby steps socially. God Bless

needfixednow 07/04/2018

Hi I’m here to try and find myself also lost my wonderful Bob to pancreatic cancer will be 2 years in October. I miss him so much pray everyday to die One year to the day after losing him I was diagnosed with lung cancer I have completed the treatments 38 radiation and 7 chemo then on to immune o therapy have had 7 treatments but I keep getting pneumonia side effect of immune o therapy I would rather be outside but can’t breathe out there life is miserable I had 5 children but a relationship with 2 and they both live 2 hours away from me and are very busy in their professional lives don’t have time for mom as should be God didn’t put them on this earth to babysit their momma Any recommendations how to get past all this pain set alone in my house weeks on end no one calls comes over. They text to check on me so do t have to come find a dead body after weeks I have tried visiting friends in other states to run from the pain Traveled to places my husband and I wanted to go to running from the pain shop till I drop reading my Bible joined a grief meeting but they kept canceling on me I was important enough any new suggestions please help

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