I lost my wife of 43 yrs. o Nov.6th so I am travelling a similar path, and am retired so I don't even have that distraction. Losing children and a spouse sounds infinitely worse and I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you will find a way to heal, as I am also struggling to find.

this isn't something we can figure out. It's beyond our mind. One day at a time sounds like a terrible sentence but it's all we can handle This Day.

I too lost my husband of 43 years unexpectedly on November 3rd. I’m still in shock and don’t know how to go on without him. I don’t know if I even want to try. I thank God every day for my daughter and son-in-law but they can’t be with me every minute. Right now I am so overwhelmed by everything. Larry worked at an assisted living facility and a week after his death, they had a wonderful memorial service for him. On Saturday December 16 I am having a memorial service for him just for close friends and family. Since he was called Superman at work, that is the theme of the gathering. It has been met with criticism but now I am feeling guilty because this is not the traditional method of doing things. I want to keep this gathering lighthearted and I know this is what he would have wanted. I am so torn as I am so confused. Can anyone offer any much needed advice? I am so grateful for a site like this. A dear friend of mine has been avoiding me and this is making things a lot harder for me right now.
Chris

We all wish for normalcy. Not to long ago, i had a peace about all this - part of acceptance maybe. Im still messed up, but like it or not, this is my life now. I hang onto knowing how good it was. Truly, all any of us have to do is take care of today. We get through today, each and every day. When we are ready, life will come to us on its own. Scottie

I'm sorry that you feel this way.
I don't know if this will help you or not, but probably worth entertaining the idea.
https://www.dailystrength.org/journals/the-secret-to-self-motivation

Basically the theme is when the idea comes up, just do it and not to overthink things.

Everyone is different and you sound alot like me. I go to work and come home eat and sleep...do it all over again for 12 days then have 2 days off and i clean the mess of the last 2 weeks...over and over again and again. My job is my highlight of my life.My adult children are busy and I have no one too. Was a stay at home Mom for 35 years and now i am working full time.I talk to myself...I live alone and i can :)Life is forever changed..everyone who loved me is now dead.Then i remember i have a couple of people who care about me..it helps me not to panic when i feel so alone.Thats how i make it through the days..love my bed and sleep but i can not sleep because of work. Up by 6 to bed by..7 to 9 pm. Was going to take myself out somewhere and i may yet..movie or a meal just to watch people..it helps with the loss of connection. ( Hugs)

Triple hugs Toot, I am so sorry that you are suffering so and have lost so much. I hope this coming new year brings you an answer to being able to do what you need to do for yourself to heal.

My heart goes out to you, Toot. I lost my husband 7 months ago and I am trying to get my footing. Sometimes I feel strong and sometimes I feel so lost. Sending you hugs,
Elizabeth

Shelda, this is so raw- your response. I'm glad you're not ashamed or inhibited to describe exactly your present reality...
I'm sure quite a few of us (me for 1) can identify with it all. I'm going to post something now but you've probably already summed up my post. God bless...

I can really relate to your feelings of loss and emptiness. Lost my soulmate of 17 years on Oct. 4th. Some days all I can do is breathe in and breathe out. I look at things, but don't see what I'm looking at. I do have her Mom and sister to lean on and we all made it thru this Christmas together.
May you find comfort as time goes by.