Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

3,758 Members
19,465 Posts
0 Online
Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

He is not coming back...

Kimberlina
Kimberlina

Every morning I wake up in the giant king size bed and just lay there and think " this was not supposed to happen yet " This morning I just looked out the window and broke down into tears. I never knew you could miss someone so much. It has been just over 8 months and somedays I feel so depressed. This last weekend I was invited to what  I will call the first couples type party where I went all by myself. That in it self felt weird.  We just had a immediate family service so many of these people I have not seen since before Jim's death and the condolences were overwhelming. Wondering if maybe that is why I am feeling more emotional. I am feeling alone in the human since. I know that God is with me for I would not have lasted this long had He not been. I do not even know what to pray for lately. Our life was not always perfect but we were content. I know he is never coming back to this world. So I think my prayer is to be content in the life I have now. 

vwidow
vwidow
Hi Kim. As you may remember we lost our dear partners on the same day.
Just recently I received condolences from an aquaintance I made. I felt pretty numb to them...But last night I rediscovered voicemail from several mos. before his going. In one he was talking about turning a corner and getting better. I said in my mind in the past "yeah, turned a corner only to face death."
His voice sounded familiar, comforting and odd at the same time to me. It's so strange--you know people are spirits. His voice still exists but his body is dust partly in the seabed...

Just thought I'd air back to you a little.
God allows what he will and none of us can change things now (or then or in the future), only him. I just think on the day when hopefully I'll see and talk with him again and understand all...
vwidow
vwidow
BTW that is a great prayer to pray nowadays for us. For "godliness with contentment is great gain." And it says elsewhere that the widow has her hope set on God.
scottito
scottito
I know it's hard. Trying to build a new life is even harder. Seems I've outgrown most of the "normal" people out there who are wasting their life, not having a clue what real love and living life might be. I count my blessings to have had it once in my life. Let death change us into better people. Either way, it has changed us all. Don't let it all be for nothing. Scottie
Kimberlina
Kimberlina
Thank you all. vwidow I too found the deleted messages on my phone last night after a bible study about listening to God . I listened to Jim's voice and felt a different peace than I have ever felt before. Mind you they were short little bleeps like, I am on my way home traffic is going slow or I am at the grocery store "do you need......" Never realizing before but listening to the many messages they all started with "Hi dear" Waiting to hear that again someday.
Clarinda
Clarinda
My husband is in pieces in an urn. Definitely he is gone for good. I will never see him again nor will I ever be with him again. To think otherwise is to be completely unrealistic. There is no comfort in believing something that isn't possible. I prefer not to be stupid.
Kimberlina
Kimberlina
Not stupid! I know where my husband is and I will see him again. Just not on earth.
raininseattle
raininseattle
Kim - I would pray for you to see hope at the end of the tunnel. The day where you are strong enough to not feel like a struggle to wake up. The day you find a new flow in your life. It might take a few years to accomplish but you can do it.
Posts You May Be Interested In
  • cedarbrooke

    As I Get Older....

    Posted by: cedarbrooke
    Last Reply: JazzyLady
    4
  • billwfriend

    I cannot get a cut and paste to post

    Posted by: billwfriend
    Last Reply: cedarbrooke
    5
    Old Hillbilly Wisdom:Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.Keep skunks, bankers, and politicians at a distance.Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.The best sermons are lived, not preached.If you don't take the time to do it right, you'll find the...