Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

3,758 Members

19,465 Posts

0 Online

Mgould 05/29/2011

Ive always talked to guardian angels. Do I really have one? I don't know. Six months before my husband died my life was a disaster and I was crying and slammed the car door and said "where is my guardian angel?" I went in a store and came out 10 min later and found a silver & gold cross next to car. Thought this meant my luck would change - but then my husband died months later.

So, without going into great detail, Ill just say last Weds. I felt like I was at the end of my rope - really felt like I couldnt take any more problems from kids, house, family, cars, financial, etc. Had 4 different bad things happen in 24 hours. Yelled at guardian angel too. Thursday - Jury duty. Still a wreck. Took train into Chgo - Looked at the Chicago River & thought I wonder what would happen if I jumped in. (I wouldn't - just wondered)

Went into McDonalds and sat at first table near cashiers- crowded. An old woman came up to me and asked for a quarter. I gave her one - looked down to close purse and back up and she was gone. Apparently left quickly and didn't ask anyone else. It seemed odd - she must have run out. Then a few minutes later another old woman sat next to me. She was missing teeth and had on old, stained clothes. She said, "I make angels. Do you want to see?" She took out an angel she made from a paper coffee cup. I mentioned my husband had died and said "I could use an angel" and bought one for $3. She was smiling and very pleasant. Then she suddenly became very serious, got closer to me, and said "you are going to make it through this and you will become a stronger person." She then got up and left. I thought it strange. Like the other old woman she did not approach anyone else in McDonalds for money but me.

I walked to jury duty and stopped on the bridge over Chicago River. I felt like George Bailey when the Guardian Angel - an old funny looking man - comes to talk to him after he's standing on the bridge and feeling at the end of his rope. It struck me as odd though. It was not like she was trying to be supportive to a stranger - it was different - like she knew things would get better and was telling me a fact. Just makes me wonder - and it did give me hope- maybe it will get better. Anyone have an opinion about guardian angels?

deleted_user 05/29/2011

I know each person has gaurdian angels, just know they are there watching you, the more faith you have in them the more you will know too. They are always with you. This is probably the reason you found us, so we can all help each other

leminmpls 05/29/2011

I have come to realize the truth about being a little more vulnerable these days - I suspect the old ladies had a good read on you (especially since you had just been looking at the river and wondering what would happen if you jumped in). Sometimes I think we look as sad as we feel, we kinda give ourselves away if you will. Still, I would love to think there are guardian angels and that all the bad, crappy things that have happened since our spouses died are merely a test to see just how much we believe.

deleted_user 05/29/2011

Yeah - it's happened to me. I don't about official Guardian Angels - maybe we give off signals that we are in need? It's one of the delights of life I guess. When Jerry was in the hospital, before Hospice, they made me get out of his room for a while, and I went into the critical care waiting room - I was all by myself. I just sat there - couldn't read, or watch TV - just sat. All of a sudden, two ladies came into the room - they weren't hospital people or volunteers that I know of. They came right up to me, and one lady said ''you look like you need a hug'' - I let her hug me tight. She then asked if I needed anything from the cafeteria, that they were going, and would be back. I said no thank you. The other lady gave me a hug and they went out! Didn't see them again, but I sure needed those hugs. Many other kindnesses from strangers have happened to me, and that's why I try to return the favor. I spent a little time in a wheel chair - and have friends who are in wheelchairs, and have handicaps. I noticed that nobody looks you in the eye, or looks at your face - like they are going to catch what you have. I always look at people, and often when I talk to them further, ask how/what's going on with them. People want to talk. Anyway, long story is I try to pay it forward because I know how wonderful it feels to get help - Guardian Angels or not!!!!.

deleted_user 05/29/2011

To my knowledge the Bible does not use the specific term guardian angle. However in Psalm 91 it does say "For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways". I do believe we have angles watching over us. My husband said he could hear angles singing during his battle with cancer. This happened to him on three different occasions. I believe they were there to give him comfort and support. Perhaps this happened to him because he loved to sing praises to the Lord. All I know for sure is that my husband was blessed by this and it made him feel secure in the arms of the Lord.
Blessings,
Helen

Nicker07 05/29/2011

Make yourself familiar with the angels, and behold them frequently in spirit; for without being seen, they are present with you.
ST Francis De Sales

deleted_user 05/29/2011

When my mother was in the hospital, she always asked the doctors to tell me everything, because I understood, being a medical professional, and she didn't. Then, one day, her doctor told me they had done all they could for her and said it would be only a matter of days. No one else was with me at the time, and when he left, I leaned against the hall way corridor, closed my eyes, and thought, Dear God. I need someone to talk to. I felt desperate. I heard a voice near me, opened my eyes. A man on crutches saying, "You need someone to talk to. Let's go sit for a bit in the waiting room." So we did, and he stayed with me a good half hour, calmed my fears, tdried my tears, hen struggled to his feet to leave. He walked very slowly on those crutches, one in each hand, appearing as if he had had polio in his younger days. As he made his way out the doorway, I jumped up, remembering I hadn't thanked him. It was less than 5 feet away....didn't take me 10 seconds....and he was gone! No nearby doorway. I ran up and down the hall, grabbing everyone I saw, asking if they'd seen a man on crutches go by. No one had. God sent me an angel that day. There was simply no other explanation. So yes, I do believe.

edithbathgate 05/30/2011

My mother told me, before she died about 9 years ago, that she would be my guardian angel. I didn't think much of it at the time. But a few days after my husband died I was lying in bed in the morning with my eyes closed, feeling so sad and helpless. Then I opened my eyes and there, at the end of the bed, stood my mother, looking perfectly normal, (no wings or halo.) She walked up beside me and pulled the blanket up over my shoulders and shook her head. She said, "Oh, Edith, I'd have done anything to keep to from having to go through this." Then she shook her head again and walked out of the room.
There was nothing unusual about the whole encounter. It was absolutely normal and and unremarkable apart from the fact that she had been dead for 8 years.
I was not raised to believe in angels, I was raised in a rather strict
Protestant home. I am not at all "New Agey," I am a school teacher.
I have since felt my nother's presence on a number of occassions. We really didn't get along super well in life, nor were we extremely close, but we loved each other. I say - Angels are where you find them. I guess the question is.. can we be one for some else? Many of you have been angels for me!

deleted_user 05/30/2011

A few days before we pulled my husband from the ventilator that kept him breathing my daughter and I were sitting in the ICU waiting room when a man walked in and sat down. He had a cane in one hand and was elderly, but looked so much like my brother in law (whom my husband was very close to)that my daughter brought him to my attention and remarked how much like her uncle he looked. The man sat there for a few moments, spoke to no one, just watched us for a few moments but did not speak, and then got up and left. The next day was the same, he came in at about the same time, right before visiting hours, sat and watched us for a few moments and then got up and left but this time as he left the room he turned and watched us and made eye contact for several seconds as he left the room, again I couldn't help but think how much he looked like Alan, just a little older, hair a little grayer, and I felt like this man wanted to tell me something. It crossed my mind that maybe it was Alan, Alan had passed away four years before this, but the implications of that were not something I wanted to think about, so I pushed that thought away. He was not waiting at the ICU doors like everyone else, I never saw him in the ICU unit at all and I never saw him again. Two days later we arrived at the ICU unit for the early visiting hours to find that things had taken a horrible turn for the worse and it was evident my sweet husband was gone. Since that time I have revisited that experience over and over, and have given it so much thought. I do believe that Alan was there, he was Steve's guardian angel, and that he was there to usher him home. I believe that he left us that last day we saw the man in the waiting room. When they pulled him from the ventilator there was no struggle, nothing was left there but the tired body of a man who had fought so hard to live, because he didn't want to leave his family, his wife, his children and grandchildren behind. I believe Alan came to tell him it was time, time to go home and rest, and that he was trying to tell us it was time to let go, that the healing we were praying for was not to be, Steve's time had come. So yes, I do believe in guardian angels, I may not have seen mine, but I believe I saw Steve's on those nights in the waiting room.

deleted_user 05/30/2011

I firmly believe we each have an individual Guardian Angel not counting the myriad of other angels who have different jobs to do. I talk to my angel and call him MICAL. ( I know that they are not male of female but I like to have a "man" around.)
Not an angel story, but a few days before my husband passed, I heard him say "Grandmom, I'm not ready yet!" (They had been very close.) It made me feel good that there was someone with him.

Wmsbaby 05/30/2011

I believe. My husband was very sick for about two weeks before he left. He kept asking if I saw the man or why was the man here. He said it was a black man watching him. I told him it was his guardian angel. He said he didn't think so. I thought perhaps it was his meds but he saw him so often. I have since read two different books about dying. It was stated in both books that the angel of death is usually visable to the dying and almost always appear as a male and black in color. If I had only known.. I would have hugged and kissed him so much more. My husband also saw his grandmother and mother the day before he left. They passed away two weeks apart of each other six months before my husband. Yes i do believe we have angels of all kinds.

michaelbmanning 05/31/2011

I know I have one. He has been around since I was a child. I named him Norm...do not know why, but he has always been Norm. I hear music when he is around and I know he listens to me.

Maggie

Join the Conversation