Keith: We have all felt the pain of this awful loss of our love. After 2 years there are moments when I still wish I could be dead so I'd be with him. But taking our own lives would mean such incredible pain for all of our loved ones on top of the loss they have already suffered. I know in the beginning I did a lot of reading about the afterlife and about others who had suffered loss and how they survived. I attended a bereavement group through a church for a very short time. There are people who will be with you in your pain. Even a therapist may be able to help. Reach out through a local church, hospital or hospice. Your medical doctor may also be able to direct you to resources. You should continue to come here and share your feelings. We have all been where you are right now and understand the pain of this loss. The only way through it is to let it out, write, cry, yell, do something physical ( not dangerous) and know that over time grief changes. It sucks, there is no sugar coating this, but you can survive. I wish you peace. Marybeth

Hi Keith123,
I'm very sorry for the loss of your wife and best friend...I agree with Marybeth,the hurt and pain...,emptiness,loneliness,feeling like there's a huge hole in your heart,and all of the other things you're feeling is where everyone on this website has or is going through the same feelings and will continue to go through them simply because we never stop missing our loved one that passed away.A key thing for me was taking one second at a time...anything pass a second was too much for me.Please reconsider taking your own life...that will be too hard for the people that's still hurting over the passing of your wife to deal with another loss....I'll be praying for you and your family if that's okay with you

Thank you both for your messages. X

Hi Keith and welcome. I too lost my husband suddenly to multiple myeloma on March 29th of this year. It came on suddenly with no warning. He was diagnosed on March 2nd and only lasted 28 days. It will be 7 months on October 29th and I miss him so. For me, my life has changed forever and cannot find joy in my heart. Greif is a process and is different for everyone, remember the good times and memories to uplift you. I pray every day for strength and knowledge on how to move forth without him. I will say a prayer for you as well.

Thankyou.

All of us who have lost their spouses/partners/ loved ones feel this unimaginable pain and loneliness ...know that you are not alone in this. We try to survive the best we can although sometimes it is hard to imagine how we can still be alive with so much pain to bear everyday. Don't give up...all of us who are left behind are the ones keeping the memories of our loved ones alive, even though remembering can be very painful. Who else will mourn for our loved ones? You feel so much pain because you shared so much love as well. It's going to be one year this coming Nov. 4 since my life became unrecognizable to myself. I became a widow at age 34, my husband was 38 when he died. To be honest, I don't know how I'm going to face the years to come....I don't make long term plans anymore. I just try to survive each day as it comes...hopefully one day you'll find your way of coping with the pain. I don't think it will ever go away, you just find a way to survive it...be it a day at a time or even an hour at a time. I hope we all get some relief from our pain and that life will be kinder to us all....