I have also expressed the same things to a counselor. As a pastor myself, who was used as a grief counselor several times, I chose another pastor as my counselor. Quite satisfying. If you have a church, I suggest you consider your pastor.

I have been thinking about grief counselling for myself as well. Havent found one yet. I would be interested in knowing how it works out for you. Gardome do you think it really helps ?

Grief counseling helps. Though I never did one on one, I did go to a Griefshare at my church. I had found DS first and talking here is basically anonymous so when I first went I had no idea what to expect. Everybody there is going thru some type of grief not necessarily a spouse but grief just the same. You do not have to talk you can just listen for a while until you do feel comfortable. I hope after going today it gives you a sense of hope.

Grief counselors are trained to help us process what we're feeling. If you find one that's a good fit for you, it can be very beneficial. As we grieve, we go through so many different phases, emotions, regrets, progress, and setbacks. It's a long process, not an easy one, and you deserve to get help and guidance. Many of us hit a low point after our loss, where we are ready to seek help and start finding our way back to a somewhat happy life. Good luck and many hugs to you!

Receiving grief counseling will help you have the tools to survive and rebuild. You will have to do that anyway, so why not give yourself the best possible chance of doing that? Counseling was my private place to scream and cry, especially since I had to carry on for my sons, and while they saw me breakdown an awful lot, there were some things I simply could not put them through.

My marriage to Cliff wasn't perfect. We had had some serious ups and downs, there were old hurts as well as the new feelings that came with my grief. Sometimes friends, family, faith, and even your DS friends aren't enough. That's when it helps to see a trained professional.

I want to state also that grief counseling is not something you will need to do "forever," as a lot of people are reluctant to begin therapy as they think it will go on and on and on, and some people think 'oh, I can't afford that.' You only need to go as long as you feel it helps. I would encourage you to give it at least 3 sessions. That will usually tell you if the therapist is helping you or not. If it's not, then another therapist or a group may be better for you.

I got mine through an Employee Assistance Program at work. That program also provided counseling for one of my sons as a dependent. Both were free. My younger son was still in high school, and his school psychologist and guidance counselor provided his counseling, which was also free. EAP benefits and school services are things we have worked for and earned, so if anyone is eligible for either of those, they shouldn't feel bad about accessing them.

Most hospices and also most (medium to large) churches have some sort of bereavement group. There was nothing close to me that I could access, so I was lucky I had the EAP option.

It was hard going through it all, but the payoff is when you get through a significant portion of your grief, then you have more emotional freedom to feel glad for the time together you had. If you try to numb yourself or bury it all, you never get to the good feelings and gratitude for the those memories. It's not just about ending the pain; it's about finding the freedom to be glad again.

Let us know how it goes for you.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

Grief counseling is a good thing to have. I know it helped me a lot, and even after months of counseling I too also went to group therapy, and that helped me as well as you are among others that this also has happened. It makes you feel like you are not the only one going through this. I hope you do go through with this as it does help. Hugs.

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I sincerely appreciate your support, it means so much. Today went okay, very emotional (and I hate being emotional) - but I do think I need more than just one session so I guess I will suck it up and make another appointment.

I'm considering it as well. Please let me know how it goes.thanks

Grief counseling has been so helpful for me and for my girls. We've been fortunate enough to have a wonderful new therapist in our area who works mainly with children but also families and a handful of adults.