Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Getting harder

Lielie
Lielie

Today 6 weeks and 4 days, not getting better. When im busy at work its not to  bad, when i get home and robert is not there, it really hurts. But the hardest part is going to bed. I cry every night. I get angry sometimes, why did he have  to die, why .not a murderer or rapist, why him. I know this is not the way it is, but i get sk mad! He was supposed to get well and come home. Work again, fish, drink coffee in the mornings on the potch. We were suposed to move to the coast and spend wonderful years together. Instead i am left with memories, unbearable heartache, and the years stretching into infinity. Not fare.

Kimberlina
Kimberlina
So sorry for your loss. It will be 3 months on Friday that I lost my husband. It was at about the six week mark to me that I believe the shock started wearing off and reality began. I actually enjoy going back to work because it takes me away from reality. Weekends and a going home are the most difficult I get it. Everywhere you look there is a memory or a reminder. I keep getting told that this grief journey is long ...
I put my husbands picture inside my cabinet above my coffee maker so when ever I make coffee we or I have a nice little chat with him. I pray that you will find some comfort from your good memories. (((Hugs to you)))
vwidow
vwidow
You know we all feel these same things-in the club that, as someone said, nobody wants to be a member of. Going from here (you are here X) like the map says, is all we have now. So life is all about coping. Having to face guilt when it comes right in front of us--we're still alive and they're not. If we knew with certainty that they were safe, even happy, then that would make a difference?! We'd be less sorrowful even though they're not with US anymore. Concerning those who've fallen asleep in Christ, we're not to mourn "as the rest who have no hope." This should make it easier for believers. But if you're not sure where your spouse went? I hope I'm being more comforting and not less...Overall we trust in God's mercy/mercies, which "are new every morning." Have we woken up crying? God sees...When the disciples heard that Lazarus was dead they said let us go and die with him. And even Jesus wept over the scene. Death is an enemy. But Jesus defeated it. Death and hell will be thrown into the lake of fire- the 2nd death. Death will be put to death. Amen.
vwidow
vwidow
My husband's been gone just over 3 months. At the end of 2 months things changed a bit for me. A phase seemed to end. I don't have his complete findings yet (autopsy), but I guess that won't matter, as far as my grief's concerned. I realized yesterday that the hurt or pain that I feel is because he was hurt. If he is comforted and happy now then I am happy, yet still bereaved.