Oh Arlene, my heart breaks for you. It's hard but unavoidable. Let yourself grieve. Sleep w his shirt or anything that helps comfort you. Anything to get you through.
Prayers to you!
Darcie

Arlene, I'm very sorry for your loss. It's very difficult to watch our loved one's miss those milestones in their lives.

Your journey now begins. It will be filled with a hazy fog for a while and that's to protect you. We are here for you and know exactly what you're going through and know what your days ahead will feel like.

I'm at 28 months. Some days it feels like it happened a million years ago and some days it feels like it happened yesterday. I still find myself crying every single day. The tears don't last as long and It's much easier to come back from the black hole of grief. My love for my Morey was very deep and filled my soul.

I wish you peaceful days and nights. Trust in yourself through this process. Be kind to you.

Roz

I am so sorry for your loss! As Roz said, now your journey begins. You have found the most supportive and loving people here on DS. We all get what you are going through. Come here and we will all walk with you on this horrible grieve journey! I am at 15 months and I assure you that does get easier. Hugs. Sue

hugs to you Arlene. I am so sorry for your loss.

I am so sad and sorry for your loss. I am thinking if you tonight.
We are here with you during this devastating time.
Love and prayers for you.......Sandra

I'm very sorry for your loss. The cleaning out of meds and supplies was the first thing I did as well. Strange as it sounds even that little thing helped.

Arlene, my heart heavy for you. I remember those first few weeks and lack of sleep, weeping, just totally alone. We are all here for you and understand. Many hugs.

So sorry about your loss. Hang in there. This is an amazing group to be apart of. Sending hugs

I am so sorry for your loss! Please know that the wonderful people on this site are truly amazing. We are from all walks of life in different times in this journey, but the love and support and compassion are so helpfull with this thing we call widowhood. Please take care of yourself first. Hugs and Love, Michele

Arlene, I too am recently widowed. In fact the funeral is not until Thursday so I have yet to get through that. So you are a step or two ahead of me. I have found reading books about grief helps a little. It lets you understand what is actually happening to you. You are lucky to get grief counselling. It will help. Jo

I'm so sorry love. This is a terrible time for you. I remember the first weeks so vividly. I was exhausted from all of the planning etc. I went home after the funeral and slept for hours. The day after my husband died I got my kids to take all the medical paraphernalia to the pharmacy to dispose of. I just couldn't look at the mountain of pain meds and breathing apparatus for another single minute. My husband died from pancreatic cancer after an 18 month fight. He was only 62. I'm glad you found us because we will be able to support you in the days to come. Much love Gail xx

Arlene and Jo, I know the fog you find yourselves in, and feel the pain. Just 4 months ago, I was in the same fog. I felt a bit like a walking zombie, going through all the motions. I had a lot of paperwork to do, and we hadn't made any pre-arrangements, so I got busy very fast, and stayed that way for almost a month. The upside is that I was in pretty good shape for a month. The downside is that I'm fighting battles now that I am down the road a bit. I think we have all found the right place to share here.

Mike

Thoughts and prayers are with you through your grieving process. My husband was killed Aug 5, I swear every night feels like the first night alone. Hugs!!

Arlene, I do hope you made it through your first night alone as best you could. Exhaustion aids our sleep. And so your journey begins. Let grief happen, don't try to run from it - you have to allow yourself to go through it. Many here have said, There is healing in tears. I believe that. God's blessings and comfort to you. ~ Scott

Thank you all so much for your advise, prayers and thoughts. I did make it through the first night but woke up at 3 am and could not get back to sleep. I started cleaning. I'm not a cleaner so it was weird. Went to work the next day and made it through that too. It is lonely but I need this time to heal. Thanks again, you all seem to be a really nice group. hugs Arlene