I'm very sorry.. People really don't get it unless they have experienced it first hand..I've been getting rid of so much lately..when i stop to think about it, its quite amazing..besides way too many doctor and hospital visits, we didnt really have a thing like that for our future..i think it was all too uncertain with her health..

But i would download and sing to her, her favorite songs on "Rockband", quite often..maybe that was our thing..I'm getting rid of the controllers, they sit in my donate pile.. Simply no enjoyment of it now..no one to sing too.

Vent and get it all out..i and all the rest of us get it

Things do snowball don't they? I find it hard to face the future too. Sometimes it is just one foot in front of the other. I hope you have a peaceful day and that nothing else breaks down :) Hugs Patti

No one gets it unless they have lost what we have lost. Loosing a spouse is so much different than any other loss. Not only do you loose your love but you loose every thing that goes with him/her. One of the CL's here said it best when she said some people care but they don't know the depth of our loss. It goes beyond anyone's scope.
We too have a camper. We had been enjoying that so much. I will have to sell mine at some point and it tears me up. I have such a hard time thinking of getting rid of "our" things. We worked so hard to get to where we are in our lives. Take care of yourself and I am wishing you peace and comfort

LMJ90... Your comments are right on.

The loss of our loved one is unmeasurable & they don't know or understand the depth of our loss.


take care

Boy the camper thing hits home. When Jo first got sick I was going to sell it. Yet when she was having good weeks, we did some short trips. Did twelve to the beach last year. Now that she is gone, I realize that it was good that I did not sell it as I can still go and spend time at the beach and just take the dogs with me and not worry about them. I belong to a RV group and there are lots of people who travel alone. The camper may give you some freedom too.

Mary, your Mom is probably having a hard time because of the anniversary of your Dad's death, and her generation often thinks just pushing through and throwing out is the best way of dealing with things. Not always, but it seems a lot more prevalent. Maybe she is hoping to cut short your grief knowing what she herself has been through. I could be wrong, but it's a possibility.

Getting rid of the "our" things is always tough. I had to clear everything from our home to the bare walls, so I know how hard it is. I got some great advice here as I was going through that painful process, which is to photograph things that have a lot of emotional pull. That way, even if the item is gone, you still have something to look at and remember with if you want to.

As far as the camper, is there somewhere else it can be stored until you are ready to either fix it or part with it? Sometimes it is best not to rush too much to get rid of things. I did that and regretted it later with some items. Just a suggestion.

I am sorry for your double losses. Cliff and I had both lost our fathers (to cancer) before I lost him, so when he died things like Father's Day and all the "man stuff" became an emotional minefield for me. I hope you and your Mom can support each other through these days.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

just sent you a bit of detailed thanks for your support but received the server error we all get from time to time. Too weary to regather my thoughts, so just a great big hug and thanks to all of you