Sorry for your loss. We all feel like that. It hits like a wave. Sometimes out of nowhere. Today I got it driving to work. Just a quick memory brought tears. Other days... I am ok. It sounds so repetitive but it truly is one day, minute, breath at a time. I try to keep busy. It helps sometimes. At first those thoughts of the last moments with my sweetie kept popping into my head and I would dwell on them. Relive them over and over again. Now when they appear I try to stop and think of something good. Like a funny moment with him or even a cute animal. Anything to shoo that bad memory away. I don't want to forget but I couldn't keep going to that dark place that's all negative and sad and horrible. He's still with you honey. Don't be afraid to grieve though. You have to let that out. Cry. It's the best therapy. Really it is. Holding it in hurts too much.
Take care
Love to you
Darcie

One second, one minute, one thought at a time. I find if I fill my head with too much I become overwhelmed and then I shut down. This is very new for me because I'm a Take Care of Business kind of gal and since Morey passed I find that if I try and do what I used to do nothing really gets done.

I now have to approach things differently. I deal with one thing at a time. Because, inevitably Morey will pop into my head and then my thoughts become scrambled eggs!

When he pops into my head, I sit down and let it happen. I cry, I talk to him, I let it roll over me and then I say, "stop" and move forward again.

As time as gone by [28 months] the bouts of sadness and reflection are becoming less frequent and, when they do come, they don't last nearly as long.

Roz

I think I got through those first few months by going through the motions of working a lot and simply putting one foot in front of the other like a robot, but around two months after my wonderful husband passed away, my mind was playing tricks on me and telling me he wasn't really gone and that I was crazy for thinking he had died. That was so scary for me that that is when I went to grief counseling for an eight week small group session. The counselor explained that our brain has to protect itself and can't take in the reality all at once, and actually has to deny the truth at times because it gives your mind a break from reality. I guess my point is don't try to go it alone. All the things you're feeling have to be felt, but take care of yourself as you get used to this new reality that is just unbelievably sad and different from your old reality.

I saw this quote in a book I was reading.

"My life was suddenly divided into Before and After,
and there was no going back to Before.
But then I realized I had a choice to live the After.
I had to decide."

I'm sorry for your loss. One thing that stuck with me from a suggestion posted on this site was to pick a regular time for reflection, every day at the same time or maybe even a couple of times a day. In that way, you could notice the thought and mentally note that it would be something to think about for your next reflection time. I had a bit of luck with this.
Hugs,
Jean

A day at a time and sometimes moment by moment. I know it sounds like a clich, but it is the only way to move through the emotions. There will be days you will struggle and days you are better. Just know you will make it through. I'm sorry you have to join us. But hopefully you will find it comforting not to be alone. Sharon

For the most part, I'm usually ok during the day...but the nights are hard...