Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I have not been on in some time. I have been wandering through my emotions, thoughts, and life. It seems that I have gone back 50 steps at times. I have gone through depressive states as well as happy. But I have had so much happening that makes me feel like every thing is out of control and never going to move forward.
I still have not secured physically or mentally where my new life should start. I did move to my sister's almost 3 months ago for a job that was promised after i completed what was supposed to be routine crap. Well on Wednesday I received a call to say that someone else was given the position. Being that I have a friend there, I discover that the owner's daughter had a friend put in the position. So now here I am sleeping in the living room at my sister's ( with her husband, son, and 9 cats). I have no finances left because my savings account is drained after 9 months, my daughter is now going through divorce out in California, and my oldest son in Korea was hit on his bike while going to base( he is okay just a broken wrist), Our Anniversary was in March, followed by Easter, and his birthday this month, and then our one year exactly 2 months later. Oh Boy!!!!!!
Yep this is my new life...hahaha!
I have been trying to get something together and took a journaling class that was free to over age 50 unemployed people in NC. It was an awesome class that was profoundly deeper than I thought it would be. And now I have started a google blog (http://suememarshall.blogspot.com/) in conjunction with journaling to try and help me get through all the crap. So many people keep telling me I am not "over it" because I am "not letting go". That is a definition I would like someone to explain...what is letting go? I keep making small steps forward everyday and I "know he isn't coming back" but that doesn't mean I don't wish he could!
Please let me know if it gets easier because at 9 months I seem to have regressed some days! The tears still flow....
I still have not secured physically or mentally where my new life should start. I did move to my sister's almost 3 months ago for a job that was promised after i completed what was supposed to be routine crap. Well on Wednesday I received a call to say that someone else was given the position. Being that I have a friend there, I discover that the owner's daughter had a friend put in the position. So now here I am sleeping in the living room at my sister's ( with her husband, son, and 9 cats). I have no finances left because my savings account is drained after 9 months, my daughter is now going through divorce out in California, and my oldest son in Korea was hit on his bike while going to base( he is okay just a broken wrist), Our Anniversary was in March, followed by Easter, and his birthday this month, and then our one year exactly 2 months later. Oh Boy!!!!!!
Yep this is my new life...hahaha!
I have been trying to get something together and took a journaling class that was free to over age 50 unemployed people in NC. It was an awesome class that was profoundly deeper than I thought it would be. And now I have started a google blog (http://suememarshall.blogspot.com/) in conjunction with journaling to try and help me get through all the crap. So many people keep telling me I am not "over it" because I am "not letting go". That is a definition I would like someone to explain...what is letting go? I keep making small steps forward everyday and I "know he isn't coming back" but that doesn't mean I don't wish he could!
Please let me know if it gets easier because at 9 months I seem to have regressed some days! The tears still flow....
Big hugs to you!
Maryann
It is true we no longer have them with us in the physical, and it is devastating...but we believe that all of us are Spirit...before this life, during this life, and after...in this life, out Spirit is attached to a physical body...but it is possible for those who believe, to be visited by their Beloved...to feel the presence of the Spirit of their Beloved with their own Spirit...and most importantly, to know that their Beloved is always with them.
If I was not receiving regular Visits from Marylou, I would be out of my mind...it doesn't get easier I don't think...but the Visits offer a great deal of comfort.
Please read anything by Patrick Mathews.
Peace, Tim
We don't let go, we take the best part of what we had with us. Sharon
This is precious and embarrassing to admit, but we always took a shower together -- Pete always said, "we are saving water" -- so in the beginning it was hard to do. I think I saved water by adding a lot of tears. lol
Hoping someday I will be able to find who I am now and can support myself again. I am tired of moving from place to place while I search for a job. No one seems prepared for how needy I am at times. I wish my children where near or at least state side. But I know Pete is somewhere close...he leaves messages.
Stay strong! Nanne