I think as we are mourning our husbands we are also mourning our own mortality. I am 53 and my husband was 50 when he died suddenly. Completely unexpected. It was devastating and while we are dealing with that, our own mortality slaps us in the face. We get it. Life is so short and we never know how long we have. After my husband died 7 mos ago I came to live with my son and his family, so I had to pack up our house and put everything in storage. I am in the process of going through it all now. At first I just moved things from one box to another not really accomplishing anything. Then I realized that I didn't even want most of it. So I started boxes for each of my 6 grown children and everytime I picked something up I would put it into the box for the kid that it reminded me of. It kind of helped me deal with the face that someday I won't be here and that they are enjoying the things Gerry and I loved. I had ceased to enjoy those things. We all have to find ways to just get up everyday and function, and we do it at our own pace. God bless you

Sorry, Tru, that you've lost one more. I also lost a cousin this summer. We were the same age and used to stay together so much!!

Our mothers were sisters and we were together a lot. He was 7 months older than me, and we were actually "kissing cousins" LOL, when we were about 12 or 13, just to see what kissing was about. So, over the next few years, we talked about the people we dated, and were good sounding boards for
each other. He and Joe liked each other and then after we married, my cousin moved to another state and did get married, but, we seldom saw each other after that.
I talked to him in May, after not seeing him but maybe 2 or 3 times in the last 3 yrs. Then, the next time I hear, he has passed away. Sad. I knew his health wasn't very good. He had a severe stroke several years ago and his health has not been good since then. It did bring back so many memories though!
Sorry, I've been rather melancholy tonight, so, I'm not much help. I do know that things will be better tomorrow. :o)
Hugs, Joely

I agree, Floyd - my cousins & I grew up more like brothers & sisters but then drifted totally apart. Losing both uncles and my father within a few years brought us all close together again. Sadly.

One of the worst times in my life was several years ago. In April my mother was diagnosed with a brain tumor. Two days later my husband's brother died unexpectedly from a heart attack. Six wks. later my favorite male cousin died unexpectedly - he was 53. I was absolutely blown away by the 3 terrible events. I felt like I could not bear to attend my cousin's funeral -- and that I could not stay away. It was about a 10-12 hr. drive. Finally, another female cousin and I decided we HAD to go -- and were glad that we made this "goodby" trip. We had loved him as kids, as he did us, and stayed in touch all the time. That was one year I was glad to see go into the history books. As we get older, loss comes to us more often. This is why we need a good support system - including our DS friends.
Doye

I LOST MY HUSBAND 10 YEARS AGO, I GOT MARRIED TO THIS MAN WHEN I WAS 14 YEARS OLD WE GOT ALONG GOOD, I WAS SICK FOR 4 YEARS WITH DEPRESSION, I FELT I DID NOT WANT TO LIVE WITH OUT HIM.BUT I DID, SO 5 YEARS AGO I LOST MY FIRST GRAND DAUGHTER, SHE WAS 30 YEARS OLD THAT SEND ME TO THE HOSPITAL FOR 28 DAYS AND THEN MY ONLY DAUGHTER TOOK CARE OF ME FOR ANOTHER FEW MONTHS MY DAUGHTER NEVER HAD TIME TO GRIEF BECAUSE SHE WAS TAKING CARE OF ME ..3 MONTHS AGO I LOST MY ONLY DAUGHTER TO A HEART ATTACH.HER BIRTH DAY IS SEPT, 25 SHE WILL TURN 50 NOW IVE STOP PRAYING AND I AM QUESTING GOD WHY???? EVERY ONE I LOVED HAS DIED WHY WHY. WHY?? WHY?? RESOBT3C

Sorry to hear about your cousin. I think after losing our loves and carrying the grief our heart just opens up and we experience such empathy. Hug, Donna

When we're young, we never think about death. But somewhere along about 45 or 50 we start losing loved ones. I am 64 and there is only one relative left in the generation above me. My sister and I are the only ones left in our generation. I, too, am sick of death and dying. But it is a fact that we are all on a life conveyor belt. We stepped on the belt at our own time and we will step off at our own time. I never knew the latter years would be so painful, though. The joy I have is knowing that every day that passes, I am one day closer to being with my Lord and my loved ones in heaven. There are more loved ones there than here now.

Think you are right about facing our own mortality............only now, I have a different perspective...................less fear, and more ............ok.................I"ll see him again the sooner I die too...............would prefer I just close my eyes, go to sleep and the good Lord take me home........................ok......so that may not be the way..........................but some days sure sounds like a plan...................lol
L