I have my Heather with me at home. I talk to her every day about everything and nothing. Thats what we did. We had an 18 year running commentary on life and I know exactly what she would have said in any instance. It was our language and I carry it on. I don't think you're alone in not wanting to let them go.

Thank you. So many people have said “it’s just ashes or it’s just a body in a grave, they’re not here” but I still talk to them like they are. Both of them were my strength when I felt weak, They both loved me for me and never asked me to be different. They were two totally different personalities but both very loving and made me happy. I know what you mean about the commentary on life. I wish more people understood, but then again it’s a double edged sword because I don’t want anyone else to feel this pain and they’ll never understand unless they’ve been through it. Hugs to you.

Funny I talk to my husband we even argue. I
say look man I'm sad so shut up if I cry. Like you we ran everything through each other. I miss that back and forth. When he had the stroke he couldn't talk, So Id carry both sides of the conversation and it would crack him up. I'd like to think he's listening and laughing.

I think they’re listening.. I have to believe that because without that I couldn’t continue. I have to believe that when I’m having a bad day that Terry is up there saying “ now honey, you just need to look at it as a good day” and I can hear him laughing and see that smirk on his face when he says it.. I can hear Steven saying “you just need a hug and everything will be better “ because he was sure that hugs cured EVERYTHING!! And I can still feel his arms wrap around me and hold me tight. I sometimes lay in bed and just before falling asleep I swear I hear them both saying “goodnight, I love you”. And I say it back. Hugs to all of you. This group has really been such a great support for me just knowing that I’m not alone like I thought I was. I feel like I’ve gained a new family!! Thank you everyone and Hugs all around.

Perfectly normal. More importantly if it brings you comfort and strength all the better. Ann’s ashes are buried in our church garden, next to her parents. I occasionally stop in the afternoon and sit on one of the benches if the weather is. Ice.

I spread most of Toni’s ashes near a lake we loved, kept some. I talk to pictures around the house.

Coldbiker, thank you for sharing that. I’m glad you have that special place. It certainly helps to know that I’m not crazy, lol, well at least for the fact that I talk to my late husbands, in other ways I’m not so sure... Hugs to you.

Inked1, I don't think you belong in a straight jacket at all. I still talk to Mike...I think that if I didn't do this, I would be more devastated because the loss would feel too final. This way, I feel like he's somewhere out there, listening to me. He was buried in his home state of RI and I unfortunately had to move back to Toronto Canada about six weeksafter his death so I don't get to physically visit him so I think that perhaps on some level I need to have that communication with him in order to keep my sanity. Hugs to you and take care.