Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Almost 10 months

kadji
kadji
It's been almost 10 months since I last my beloved Jimmy and it just seems like it was yesterday. Although Time marches on it doesn't let you forget. I figured this way, if I can get through the first year I figure it may be a little easier because I won't have to remember the previous year and all the memories that we shared. That may sound stupid but it's just my coping mechanism that I guess kicks in,it's funny how you think you can be doing OK and then a song comes on or somebody says something or you see another couple sharing their love together and then you just break down and cry and it just seems like it was yesterday ! I don't think you ever quite get over loosing the love of your life. I will say to all the broken hearted who are just starting this awful journey, you will have better days and it does get better with time. So try to keep the faith and hang in there and I will continue to pray for you all.
BandiBlue
BandiBlue
Thank you for the prayers ... how kind of you!

Wishing you peace . . .
joannklingaman
joannklingaman
Oh Kadji.... I so feel your pain & everyone handles the loss of their love in different ways. I am almost 15months into losing Larry, and I miss him just as much. How do explain to people that your heart is broken & you feel that it will never mend. There are just so many memories to overcome. I will continue to try, because Larry wanted me to be strong. Like you said some days are better than others...

Take care
lmj90
lmj90
its been almost 10 months for me as well. I hate it just as much as I did the day he passed. The world moves around me and I stand still. It hurts so much. I miss him more every day. Thank you for the prayers.
Lisastp
Lisastp
It will be 10 months for me too and I think I'm entering a new phase -- less "numbness" and more pure sadness and teariness. I'm using every strategy I know to keep going -- yoga, meditation, friends, family, kids, dogs, work, healthy eating, rest, etc. etc., and all those things are making this bearable.

I read a book (can't remember title but kept a quote from it) that said "I will feel the loss and not fight the grief, because I've found that the changes I feared would ruin me have always become doorways, and on the other side I have found a more courageous and graceful self."
Coop84
Coop84
Thank you Kadji!!! We will never get over losing our soul mates but with time it does get easier. Sending hugs to everybody!!! Sue
lreyn330
lreyn330
It has also been 10 months for me. After 30 wonderful years of marriage, here I sit, alone, lonely, sad, heartbroken and scared. Nothing can prepare a person for something like this. Each day I think I am going to get through today without crying. I haven't made it yet. Oh when do we learn to cope better. Prayers for you and so sorry for your loss. You are not alone. Linda
npc4204
npc4204
Kadji,
I understand.
It's 13 months since my husband passed. It feels like yesterday and it feels like forever.
Hugs,
Janie
lonely60
lonely60
Kadji I am only 5 months on this journey and I know people say the 1st year is the hardest until you get through all of the firsts. I am not sure that the second or third year or the years to come will be without pain or loss. I am not sure that it our goal to ever stop feeling the loss or the pain just hopefully manage to get through it. Hope you continue to find some peace as you continue on your journey.
Dave
dcheramie
dcheramie
9 months, 1 day here... 274 of the hardest days ever..

i echo your sentiment, keep the faith and hang in there..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VE6rMq5wmg
hiskim
hiskim
It's nice to know it gets better with time, and that we're covered by prayers. Thank you, and God bless you. Kim
Rainbow27
Rainbow27
At 17 months, I still feel my heart is broken and that is okay. We loved each other with all our hearts and took good care of each other. He was my best friend in the world.

Have two girlfriends with stage iv cancer who are in their 60's and a lady I visit in hospice who is in her 90's. I have the time now since my husband died to make sure they have companionship up to the very end. Today I heard remarkable comments from the 90+ year old who told me she was angry at her husband for not taking her with him when he died. She said every minute since has felt like a punishment. He has been gone for seven years. I sense she is just waiting to be with him... I look at all the lovely pictures she has of the two of them together and truly understand that they are meant to be together.