Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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MiaFelina 08/01/2013

I've been attending a weekly grievance group that has been very helpful for me. One of the things our facilitator said has stuck with me and I thought it might help those of you that have lost a spouse. She refuses to use the title of widow or widower instead we call ourselves surviving spouses, after all....that is what we are.
I hope this helps......using the word survivor reminds us of who we are!
We are all survivors.......and we're surviving this journey we're on....together.
My prayers for strength are with you.....

asarivg12 08/01/2013

I know labels can have a powerful effect on how you think. The point you make that we are the ones still living is kind of what I focus on. I want to use the time I have left in such a way as to deserve the fact that I survived.

Many things are totally out of our control, but for whatever reason we are left with more time. Hopefully we will make good use of it.

Bob

MiaFelina 08/01/2013

I couldn't agree with you more!

kelleysgirl 08/02/2013

I've had difficulty thinking of myself or referring to myself as a widow. I like the sound of "survivor" much more....there's a lot of positive in that little word. Thanks for sharing!!

jewells1 08/02/2013

Thank you for sharing, Though some days I would add a a few descriptive adjectives to it.

deleted_user 08/02/2013

Hello,

I really like the words from Bob....I want to use the time I have left in such a way as to deserve the fact that I survived.

My fiance has been gone 3 1/2 months now and after the initial shock and disbelief, I started feeling like I have to go on to make him proud of me. Recently, I have started thinking that as I,m still here, I need to make the most of my life and do something that truly matters - I don't know what that is yet but I know I have to do something meaningful.

My fiance certianly didn't deserve to die and he should still be with me but he did die and I'm slowly learning that no matter how many time I wish he was back, it's not going to happen. One day I know I will get my life back on track and life the life he would have wanted for the both of us.

x

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