I met my wife on my 23rd bday. I just had my son keenan jr 5-6 weeks prior. her and I both came out of a bad relationship. We had no intentions on starting a relationship but it just happened. we got married on 08/08/08. she had two kids and I had one. we had a daughter together. so its 3 boys and 1 girl. in 2009 she had a gastric bypass because she doubled her weight almost when pregnant and she has always battled her weight while she was in the marines. she was about 165-170 standing 5'7. the surgery went wrong. she had a bowel obstruction and had to be rushed into emergency surgery in the middle of the night. I remember being scared and confused. After that she remained in constan pain. They kept feeding her Vicodin pills to her. At a point she realized she was addicted and she went with her sister out of state for a week to detox, which she did. they gave her tramadol for pain which is supposed to be non habit forming. but due to the Vicodin her sleep was never right. she would sometimes not sleep for days, or just get a few hours sleep. so they gave her ambien. she would sleep walk and speak but wouldn't remember what was being said. so I got a job at Comcast because at the time we had no insurance and we got her into a rehab. so those pills were defeated. my wife had a tubiligation(esure) because we didn't want anymore kids. so she got pregnant in her tubes and the baby died. we didn't know. we went to an emergency room and they found out and performed a dnc. a few days later she was still passing massive clots. while at a hospital appointment she passed an even larger clot and they rushed her to the emergency room and found out there was another baby. so another dnc. a week later she had to have a blood transfusion, 2 bags of blood, it took us over 10 hrs to have that done. during this time she was also being treated for depression and the VA, she was/is a veteran, kept giving her these meds for the depression. I got off work one day, during my sleep I woke up to her on top of me having her first seizure. that was nov of 2011. during the next few years we tried working with different doctors to get her fixed. a few months later my son from another woman was molested by a man while visting his mother for the court ordered visitation. this really had a negative effect on me. I stopped working on long term disability and dealt with lawyers and such.(theres another messed up story just dealing with my son and the courts and his mother) in dec 2013 my wife had her last seizure. she was able to control her moods or feelings so she wouldn't get worked up. at the start of 2014 she was able to get off tramadol and only take daily seizure meds and Ativan when sensing a seizure is coming. she had a hysterectomy in july of 2014. she had immediate isues and we kept going into the ER and different hospitals as well. In Detroit theres a few different medical grouped hospitals to choose from. doctors would say they cant find anything but they could see this large bulge in her stomache 2 bulges may I add they saw the swelling of her feet. she was released from the ER and called back as soon as she stepped foot in the door by a doctor saying we found something on a test come to be admitted. she was realeased 5 days later on 9/05. she was told to contact obgyn to have fluid drained from left abdomen area. on the doctors notes I saw after she passed which were sent to her primary doctor, the notes said dilated bowel. but why didn't they fix her there the surgery was performed by another hospital and doctor but they can still fix her she had a pain specialist apt for meds 9/10 on the 12th she died.

that morning she walked me to the door and said I loved u and I said it back. that's that last time I heard her voice. I stuck by her and argued with her when she wasn't doing as the doctors ordered. I really stuck in there. I gave her my all and I still lost her. I just don't understand how I could love a woman this deep and lose her. When I was 24 I sold my car to move out of a large home my family gave me to buy our own home because my family was treating my stepkids badly. I sacrificed and did everything that needed to be done but this has happened. I know not every man loves his family and protects them like me. I feel like this was a waste. and now my oldest which his father has probably had seen/had him maybe 3-4 times in the past 7 years I have been here just wants to take him and move him to japan. I feel as though if he knew the boy, his biological son, then maybe a year or two down the line after visits and making sure the boy will be fine then take him. he doesn't know him and my son doesn't know him either. his father was paying child support and when I asked him about the boy staying with me he said im taking him to japan and cutting off the child support. his father is in the marines and my wife was. my wife was 19 when she had my oldest. the father and my wife were in a relationship but when she was pregnant he wanted her to get an abortion she found out by word of mouth that the reason was that he was married. so that was the end of them. she put him on child support because he wouldn't assist with the boy as a baby and the court gave him joint legal and physical custody. he was given the summers for visitation. befor me my wife said he got him once. during my time I saw this man get his kid 3-4 times. one summer but he is supposed to get every summer. I know marines who have children and they just but plane tickets to have their kid there or they go and visit the kid. its never a reason not to see ur kid. he has promised the boy to see him and this and that and has dropped the ball sevral times. so I must add that the boy is going to be 15 in one month.

he left befor the funeral. I feel as though if the guy cared about his son he would've stayed with his so to ensure he was ok during the funeral. As a real man and a real father if my child is going through something im there. period.

I come from a single parent household and I felt as if my father didn't want me because of the same things my oldest has experienced with broken promises and a persons disinterest in their child. but my father was on crack, his father is mentally healthy.
my oldest was staying with me and for the 3 months that he will be here his sperm donor said he cant stay with me. I wish this guy would've cared for his so from the beginning instead of acting like he does now. my son has said he wanted to stay with me and his father said its his son and he wants him. so he wants him fr 3 years when he could have seen him more than the 7-8 times through out his life.

this guy really gives marines, a group of people we should look up to as elite. hes almost 40 or is 40 and still has not become a man.

but this is my struggle here. the boy and I are very close. I know when something is wrong with him when others wouldn't. him and I really have a connection that him and his biological father do not have simply because they don't know eachother

so Im just trying to see the sun through all these clouds. im 30 and I feel like I have gone through more tragedy then most 50-60 year olds and this is all in 7 years.