it will be difficult - makes it harder even imagining how it could feel - the importance of it all - when you just want to get as small as possible and disappear altogether.

I bet your wife will be there right beside you the entire time, especially since she was looking forward to it so, and especially since it's your 31st anniversary to boot. I don't know if that can make you feel any stronger, but I hope it can give you some silent comfort.

she is there.

Your will will be with you, both on your anniversary and at the wedding. Take time on your anniversary day to look back at wedding pictures, talk to her, cry a bit and if up to it, spend time with friends.

I remember the first time I had to get through an anniversary without my Al. A good friend spent the day with me and it helped so much.

These days come up and they are hard. So much harder than we could have ever imagined. But at the same time these are the points of joy that we need. They are beyond bitter-sweet. I hope that you can find some joy in your son's wedding. Even if you can't on the day, I hope that you can build some memories to enjoy later.

All the hugs!

I understand, very much.

Barb.

I fully understand, Rbar321.

The triggers are wearing me down.

Today would have been my wife's 54th birthday and I
would have given roses to her tonight.
.
I bought roses for her 29 years in a row and it feels so
strange not to have it on my list of things to do on the
way home from work today. I have been a zombie
today as it keeps running through my mind. I try and
try and try to not think about it but it dominates every
thought.

I agree with snowalone. I want to get as small as
possible and disappear altogether but reality will not
allow me that possibility.

Blessings to all -

Darrell

Your wife is there with you, and is happy for your son.. "Love" is the ultimate treaure to have and take with us when we leave this earth. Much love and hugs carla

I appointed my best friend to get me through my husband's wake and that worked for me. I cry watching Hallmark commercials yet I managed to get through this event dry-eyed. If there is someone you can lean on to help you manage the wedding/reception (no one expects you to be a rock but this is going to awfully tough), I highly recommend his/her support.

I completely understand with your wedding anniversary. My wife passed in August on the 18th and our anniversary was in September on the 17th. It was extremely hard.
Your wife will be at your son's wedding, both in your heart and in your son. After all he is half you and half her. So she will be there. I know it's hard but your son lost his mom please don't let him lose his dad. He is going to need you just as much as ever. I know she would want you there. Please take care.
Peace, Tim

That's tough,

Try to enjoy the Wedding for your Son, even as it reminds you of your loss.

This OG just got a tear thinking on it - and realizing another reason some cry at weddings.

Thank you all for your kind words and support, it means so much too me.

I would bring a small item of your wife's to carry in your pocket that was special to her. A small piece of her favorite jewelry or a wallet sized picture of the two of you that you can keep in your pocket. I know it will be sad that she will not be physically by your side, but maybe you'll be able to feel her spirt and love as your son makes this new journey in his life.

Always Sue

I know this is a difficult day for you. I hope you are doing ok. We are all here for you if you need us. The wedding is going to be a hard one but you are strong and you will get through it if not for yourself but for your son. I know your wife will be right by your side every minute Take care of yourself Carol-Ann

Look at this as an opportunity to make memories for and with your son.

There will be lots of picture taking and you will be in your son's wedding album for a lifetime so keep HER inside your heart and let your smile be from both of you. You won't be sorry that you tried.

Congratulations on your son's wedding and you getting through it.

Warmly,
Roz