So don't try today! Give yourself permission to not "try". Take care of you as you would a dear friend or a child. Nurture yourself however and whatever that means for you. Take long, slow breathes. Take a hot bath to relax your tired body. This journey is long and exhausting. Be gentle and kind to yourself. My heart hears your pain. Take care of you today. Tomorrow will be here soon. Sending warm hugs K

Ive done almost nothing at work today. Just sat here and faked it. Am going home to sit and do nothing and watch my kid play. That's all I got. Sitting. I suppose that is better than sleeping.

Heck I have weeks, like that. its ok, to be you, your perfect in how and why you feel the way you do. Be gentle on yourself, and just know your not alone. Much love and hugs carla

@ fuchsiasky I know that tired too. Too tired to care. I have spent the last two weeks pretending at work. The gibberish I must present as a final product, thankfully the powers that be have been away and have been very understanding. I know I'm not giving my all and it bugs me, but I have time-out zones for hours at end where I just can't anymore.

And that is a new lesson I am learning. When to just hang on by my fingernails and ride the storm till it passes and be alive to say I survived today.

My sister-in-law hadn't seen me for a few months and I went to visit. She very kindly told me I look like hell. Apparently I have a pining loss etched into my face around my eyes that just screams "TIRED".

She then sent me a thing on facebook and if I were more techno-savvy I would love to attach it to this, but I'm not so I will just share the message. I'm sure you have seen this on the web:

How can I rest when it is my very soul that is tired.

And no amount of sleep takes this tired away, right? No amount of distraction for how ever long it lasts, take away this tired. I tried to explain this to someone who asked me the other day. And I said I don't feel safe enough to relax and rest anymore. I don't know how else to put it. Something else this drastic might happen again if I am not paying attention 24/7/365.

Huh? Does that even make sense?

Lots of love to you Fuchsiasky. Lots of gratitude to everyone who posts and acknowledges that yes we're messed up. We're not okay. We're barely hanging on. But we are still here. Love and peace, till we can rest. xx

This may sound silly, but some days I tell myself today I'm not grieving. I'm not sad and not worrying about anything. It isn't like doing any of this is changing anything anyway. So I take a break and look for something to enjoy. Doesn't matter how silly it may be just something that will let me put this on a shelf for awhile. And it doesn't mean I love or miss Lyn any more or less. She knows this.
Too much of putting ourselves thru it can cause some serious helath isues. So this is where we have to take care of ourselves and sometimes it even means displaying slefishness on the surface.
When I use to ba a crisis management trainer one of my main points was you have to take care of you. If not then there will be nothing for yourslef or others.
What your feeling is your body saying enough for right now. Don't take on anymore problems or issues that takes your energy.
Put yourself first and find something to help you relax. Spending time and wathing your child paly and enjoy themselves seems like a great activity to me. Afterall he is half you and half your husband. Both living in the same body growing into a completely new human being.
Take care.
Peace, Tim

Remember..day by day. If there's a day you need to stay in bed and lock yourself in your bedroom and not answer the phone and just hide under the covers...do it. We are going to have good days, bad days, ok days...etc. Whatever you can do for your friend, I'm sure it will be greatly appreciated. Even if it's just a "Hello, I'm thinking of you".

Always Sue

I had days, many of them, where I just existed. Not even getting dressed, but spending the day waiting for it to end. It's okay to pamper yourself as long as you don't stay there. I will admit I pushed the "stay there " on occasion.

When I noticed that I had more than I could take, I talked to my doctor. Sharon

It is perfectly okay to give yourself permission to take a grief break. On those days here, I just watch Netflix. We have all been through hell and back losing our loved one. Do whatever it takes to get through the day (well almost anything)... Don't wallow forever and get back out there once refreshed and ready to face the world again.

I think we all have days like that and I've learned it's okay so if there's a day when I don't want to try I don't. I do what is absolutely necessary of me and then I go sit in my room watch a mike or I just cry. I wish there was a magic button we could press to not feel tired of all that but there isn't. I got to the breaking point where I couldn't pretend to be alright anymore it took to much effort so when I'm sad I'm sad and I've learned not to justify it anymore. It works for awhile any way there are people who I do pretend to be happy or okay around and that's because they are still hurting so bad. - Allie