Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Hi! Just thought I would introduce myself. I was widowed on 11/4/12 after 39 years of marriage. My husband died of stage 4 colon cancer 19 months after he was diagnosed. I live on a small farm with my parents next to me and my daughter and her family just down the road. We had all gathered together to be of mutual support to one another since my parents are elderly and my daughter has 5 young children. Of course my husband was key to all of this and life has been much more challenging since he died. Am trying to keep the farm producing since my income is small and this seems the easiest way to make a few dollars and still be mostly available to help out whoever has a need at the moment.
I have been reading this site for several days and have been so relieved to read much of what you are all sharing. Makes me feel like I am not completely crazy now! As some of you have mentioned, it is a difficult path because others just cannot understand the depth of what you are going through and are uncomfortable discussing things that you need to talk about. I look forward to getting to know all of you and becoming a part of this online community.
I have been reading this site for several days and have been so relieved to read much of what you are all sharing. Makes me feel like I am not completely crazy now! As some of you have mentioned, it is a difficult path because others just cannot understand the depth of what you are going through and are uncomfortable discussing things that you need to talk about. I look forward to getting to know all of you and becoming a part of this online community.
The key to survival now is to allow yourself to grieve. We need to be active, but we also need to cry and get through the loss. Take a day or some time to let the loss become real and don't try to bury it because it will only be stronger.
I lost my husband to lung cancer in 2007. Rebuilding my life was my goal but that couldn't happen until I got myself to the point of rebuilding me. Sharon
Welcome to the group that we all wish we were not qualified to belong to, but here we are. Thank God that this site does exist, it has been such a blessing for me, as I hope it will be for you. It seems that all the people I encounter are "couples", good for them but makes me feel more alone. Good to come to this site and chat with people that understand.
God Bless
Ivan
Robbie
Yes, I realize how blessed I am to have so much family close to me. I just had my 10 year old grandson over for the day since they had no school and his sisters were having friends over. They give me a lot of the affection that is so necessary and healing. They are also the reason that I cook meals once in a while. Otherwise I would probably almost never cook! Sometimes I feel guilty for still feeling so alone at times because I know that many people have it so much worse than I do.
Sharon, your words hit home with me. I know that I need to grieve. So far I have been just trying to continue to live life but I know that I need to take the time to fully acknowledge the depth of my loss. Sometimes I am afraid to cry because I don't know if I will ever stop! Life can seem so overwhelming if I take time to stop and think about it. One thing about it, I have the rest of my life to work through everything. And it may take that long.
Hugs