I know exactly what you speak of. I can recall the meal that I fixed the night before losing my husband, and the comfort I feel knowing that we went to Dairy Queen for his favorite blizzard before bed that night.

Enduring the loss of my husband feels as though I'm weathering sickness. And I guess that is accurate we are suffering sickness of the heart. Wishing you peace as you approach this milestone.

those memories will never fade. I still remember the day my mom died perfectly...no glitches in my memory. and I can recite what my husband and I did the day I suddenly lost him...words we said, the way his kiss felt, the way he made me feel that day. accepting is hard. I don't know if I am there. the memories of that day are hard. but I am so thankful that we had a good day. I wish you strength during this horrible time.

I know those feelings. I flash to the phone call and rushing to get there. It has been 2 and a half years since I lost my husband....I still miss him and think of him everyday.

As some one with PTSD, I had it before I lost my husband, and as a counselor, the best thing you can do when that starts is make sure you are grounded. Meaning, plant your feet firmly on the ground, try to listen to your surroundings pick out a noise if it be the tv or music or whatever is around you and focus on it. If you have something by you grab it for a tactile grounding, I tend to grab my cat. The purpose is to keep you in the now so that you hopefully don't have to go through the entire wave that comes with a flashback.

I will keep you in my prayers.
Many Blessings,
Sherry

I completely understand how you feel. Tomorrow will be 2 years since I lost the love of my life. Every day is still a struggle to get through without crying.. I miss him terribly. I am trying to get things organized in my life and may have to sell my home next year. I feel guilty about leaving the home we shared and where he passed but I have to do what is financially smart for me now, just cant afford it. So many changes yet the pain stays the same. I am praying for peace for us all and may time soften the ache.

I re-lived every day of his last month on earth as the 1 yr. mark approached. I don't think it can be avoided. It is heart-wrenching. After that first anniversary passed, I slowly began to feel better emotionally. It is 6 yrs. for me now, and I think I have "adjusted" as well as possible. I still get lonely, of course, and we never stop missing their presence. However, I am thankful to be far past that "raw pain" of the early days, and hope you soon will be also.
Hugs - Doye

Thanks for this post. I think back to my husband's last month, and his days in hospice care. The tears start instantly. I was with him when he took his last breath and that image is so difficult. I am praying with time the happier memories will replace. Kitkat thanks for suggestion to keep grounded in the moment, and will remember this from now on. Much peace

We remember those days frequently, but more intense before special occasions. Since my husband died at home I ended up moving my furniture around to get the image of his hospital bed out of my head. It worked partially, but over time we do replace them with memories of good times and actually feel better. Sharon