Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I have been sitting here looking at this space, almost afraid to write what I feel. I have stayed away from writing on DS for days because I am sick of myself feeling the way I do and I'm sick of answering the question of "How are you doing" , sick of feeling like a burden to those around me. . I am in such a dark place. I feel so lost and alone. Having my sons home for the Christmas holidays was such a blessing. To have someone in the house to break the deafening silence and to give me hugs helped so much, But now I am back to reality and I hate it. Its been two months since I lost my love and the pain is just getting worse. It didn't help that his death certificates showed up on Christmas Eve. I walk through my home and look at places he should be and it's just empty....lots and lots of empty. I want so badly to hear his voice and feel his touch. My dog seems to be the only one who will just allow me to grieve without guilt or expectations. But I'm sure even she's getting sick of my crying. Sorry everyone for this pity party but this is the only place I know to come to where everyone gets it and doesn't judge.
Sharon
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Sharon
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Get out as much as you can and see friends & family often. Read some books about other widows and how they dealt with the pain of loss. I find doing a jigsaw puzzle gets my mind off of things
Please take care of yourself and come here often.
hugs and hopes for a better New Year!
JoAnn
Cry if you have to, grieve your own way, and be whomever you want or feel like being. I don't ask people how they are anymore, for when I am asked all I want to say is "How in the F do you think I am?" But, I don't.
I too would like to hear his voice, feel his touch, and be reassured that the life I am living for ME is OK. I already know the answers, but I have a habit of having to physically hear them from another.
If anyone is sick of your crying, Tough S _ _ _. You lost your life, the only man you wanted to spend your life with. They can't understand that, and will not be able to until, God forbid, they lose their spouse.
I'm here with you. It's been two months for me to. I work during the week so that helps but weekends suck. Today I was driving home from the grocery store and the thought that we will never even have coffe and tea together made me stop and catch my breath. I can't even allow mymyself to think about what will never be again just small stuff like the fact that today is so ugly and we won't be hanging out just watching tv together. It is just unbearable at times. My neighbors are having a party right now and apparently it's all couples b/c I wasn't invited, a first. And that's ok with me b/c I wouldn't have gone anyway. Just another example of what will never be again. So cry b/c I do constantly, sometimes wonder where all the tears come from.
I will tell you that I have written new years resolutions and decided that regardless of this dark time I will still thank God for the 35 years he gave me with my love and for my children and grandchildren. I've also asked him to help me thru this time. I"m not a very religious gal but I really do need help and even though I feel like he took my gem to soon at least I was lucky enough to have his love for the time we had and I want to be grateful for that.
Hugs to you, I feel your pain and wish you peace.