I do understand how you feel! I guess you could say my husband was agnostic, while I a Christian! Not big into to going to church, but I did feel like I truly believed in prayer etc. Then he died! My beliefs have been shaken to the core. So I too am currently searching. Searching for answers, searching for comfort, searching for what the heck happened to my spirit? I sure don't have any suggestion as I feel as you do! Maybe the answer is out there somewhere! Hugs and Love, Michele

I have become such a fatalist. Not sure if there is some big plan, because if there is i want to talk to the person who made it. I'd give them a piece of my widow brain! Hugs Patti

I can't say I have any suggestions either, only sympathy. My parents had a bad experience with their church before I was born, so I never got a religious upbringing. My wife also had a bad experience with her church, so she left it before we met. (Yes, we were made for each other in many ways.) If anything, I've thought about the unitarians, since they seem to be more open to outsiders and maybe less dogmatic. I've known some unitarians, but never tried it.

I truly believe that there is some kind of spirit world or afterlife, but I am a bit burnt out on the "God" or religion angle. I was raised Catholic, but have never really been a "practicing" believer. I had always done my best to believe that there was a reason for everything... even some terrible things that I experienced before I met Shane.... but then I lost him suddenly in a terrible accident, and there is absolutely NO reason for that. If there is a God, he dropped the damn ball. Period.
So now, I talk to Shane... as I have done for so very long anyway. He was my strength and my support while he was here, and I continue to look to him for that now. This type of loss shakes you so badly that it is hard to believe that there is any "loving and merciful" being that has any part in things. I know that there are people who find comfort in religion, and I am happy for them. But, I find no comfort in the notion that I should be "happy" that Shane is gone. I cannot find a way to be thankful or grateful for this loss, and I do not plan on searching for a way to reach that point. I have no suggestions where religion is concerned.... possibly because I have had the bit about "God's Plan" or "A Better Place" crammed so far down my throat that my entire being has had any notion of such a being strangle out of me.

I am a "recovering Catholic" and will be all my life! Many, many bad things are done in organized religions which is why I can never attend any church ever again!! However, as Amy said, I do believe that there is a spirit world which we return to after finishing with this life. I believe in this because in my mind, I have had confirmation that I have been on this planet before. Sounds weird, I know, and I would NEVER try to convince anyone else to believe as I do. I truly believe that it is a very personal belief/connection. I hope that you can find some kind of peace kkg17.

There are lots of ways to connect with a community of people [look at us] without throwing religion into the mix.

I know that religious communities seem more tangible because they're so darned organized i.e. every Sunday they meet up, there's a leader, there's people singing together and planning and encouraging each other. It's a great support system that uplifts everyone. There's pretty statues and candles and stained glass windows, the environs are quite inviting!

There are book clubs, reading clubs, card clubs, golf clubs [that's funny] but they're really are clubs where you can play golf. There's sewing circles and knitting circles, there's even clubs for people with various illnesses and a club for grandma's. There's hiking clubs and gardening clubs. There's hospital's that need people to come and sit in rocking chairs and rock sick babies and newborns whose parents can't come to see them. These folks are called volunteers, they're even asked to go visit older people whose families have left them to die.

If we're really interested in engaging with other humans there's lots of ways that we can do that if we really want to, without doing it in the name of religion.

Me, I work a full-time job and engage with about as many humans on a daily basis that my injured psyche can handle. When the weekend comes sometimes I just want to honker down and cuddle up with just MYSELF!!!! Of course if Morey were to come back I wouldn't mind him honkering with me!!!! ;) If you know what I mean.

Roz ♥

Well said Roz. And you are NOT weird Darlene. I think we are all pretty much in the same boat with the religious thing. Being spiritual is enough for me. I don't need someone to think for me or tell me how to behave and live my life. I have a conscious and know my "truths". I don't always live by them, but I try to. Not to be judgmental, but many of the organized religious people I know are just plain hypocritical "sheeple" that need to be led the the slaughter. YAK. Don't get me started . . .