Victims of Psychopaths Community Group
Is he or she a sociopath or psychopath? Think we're only talking about serial killers here? Psychopaths, sociopaths and even narcissists come in every walk of life, every career level, and every socio-economic category.
Just got thinking about some of the P's quirks, or warning signs that you may have thought nothing of in the beginning but looking back they make more sense. Some I've noticed:
-dead eyes in his pictures- many of his pics are with other women and he always has the look of death in his eyes. A cold blank expressionless stare at the camera. (some have mentioned this in previous post)
-The sheer number of photos he has with other women. He went to a sex expo and had his picture taken with all the models. He has photos with all of the women he has ever dated (save one or 2) on his facebook. First thing I did after blocking him was delete all my photos of us from facebook. He still has all his photos with me on his. He also has photos with all his other women. Of course they were all "just friends"...riiiight. Things given to him by other women he still has. He's a collector.
-He couldn't come up with original nicknames (except for "crazy") so he would copy the nicknames I used with him. He had a hairy chest so I started calling him "fuzzy" and he turned it right around on me and pretty soon was calling me fuzzy...wtf. I started calling him chocolate (because he was dark skinned and Mexican) so he called me chocolita. He could not think up anything original on his own. I thought this was strange at the time but didn't give it much attention.
-Everything he asked me or talked about was always in the context of a friend asking or him telling a story about a friend. I am 100% sure all of these stories referred to him. When he gopt angry at me one time he said his friend was angry at me.
-Walking him through the concept of "empathy". How would you feel if I did _____ to you like you did to me? (ex. cheating) Him: I really couldn't say. Me: Oh come on, you'd freak out with jealousy, you'd be mad as hell, and probably you'd kick me to the curb. Him: "No maybe not. I can't say." Half an hour running in conversational circles like chicken with my head cut off. Me: *DUMBFOUNDED* I give up.
- Same pose in almost every picture he has. His poses are planned. When I would take pictures of him he would look at them, tell me how bad they were and demonstrate to me exactly how I should take the picture so that the background was all perfectly lined up and him in center in his usual pose. Also when not in the usual pose, he often had pictures with women (including me) where he was in a strangling position with them, his arm around their neck and pulling back on them as if to strangle them. He did this to me often and often the strangle hold was tight enough to hurt my neck.
-He covertly communicated through songs. He was always posting love songs on his FB but they would never be directed to me or anyone specific so any one of his love interests would think it was meant for them. His whole fan club was constantly liking every song he posted. But I also noticed a pattern. He would re-use the ones that really worked in certain situation. Nobody goes around reposting the same songs over and over again but I noticed he had a specific patterns when I went back a couple years in his facebook. When we would get in a fight he would post a love song on my facebook (which of course no one who wasn't my friend could see, so none of his other women would know) and I started noticing he would re-use the same songs on me because they worked on me once before to get me to forgive him. It's like he had a specific list of songs to use on women.
Any of this seem familiar? Or anything that you've thought of that was weird, quirky, or creepy with your P that you realized after?
-dead eyes in his pictures- many of his pics are with other women and he always has the look of death in his eyes. A cold blank expressionless stare at the camera. (some have mentioned this in previous post)
-The sheer number of photos he has with other women. He went to a sex expo and had his picture taken with all the models. He has photos with all of the women he has ever dated (save one or 2) on his facebook. First thing I did after blocking him was delete all my photos of us from facebook. He still has all his photos with me on his. He also has photos with all his other women. Of course they were all "just friends"...riiiight. Things given to him by other women he still has. He's a collector.
-He couldn't come up with original nicknames (except for "crazy") so he would copy the nicknames I used with him. He had a hairy chest so I started calling him "fuzzy" and he turned it right around on me and pretty soon was calling me fuzzy...wtf. I started calling him chocolate (because he was dark skinned and Mexican) so he called me chocolita. He could not think up anything original on his own. I thought this was strange at the time but didn't give it much attention.
-Everything he asked me or talked about was always in the context of a friend asking or him telling a story about a friend. I am 100% sure all of these stories referred to him. When he gopt angry at me one time he said his friend was angry at me.
-Walking him through the concept of "empathy". How would you feel if I did _____ to you like you did to me? (ex. cheating) Him: I really couldn't say. Me: Oh come on, you'd freak out with jealousy, you'd be mad as hell, and probably you'd kick me to the curb. Him: "No maybe not. I can't say." Half an hour running in conversational circles like chicken with my head cut off. Me: *DUMBFOUNDED* I give up.
- Same pose in almost every picture he has. His poses are planned. When I would take pictures of him he would look at them, tell me how bad they were and demonstrate to me exactly how I should take the picture so that the background was all perfectly lined up and him in center in his usual pose. Also when not in the usual pose, he often had pictures with women (including me) where he was in a strangling position with them, his arm around their neck and pulling back on them as if to strangle them. He did this to me often and often the strangle hold was tight enough to hurt my neck.
-He covertly communicated through songs. He was always posting love songs on his FB but they would never be directed to me or anyone specific so any one of his love interests would think it was meant for them. His whole fan club was constantly liking every song he posted. But I also noticed a pattern. He would re-use the ones that really worked in certain situation. Nobody goes around reposting the same songs over and over again but I noticed he had a specific patterns when I went back a couple years in his facebook. When we would get in a fight he would post a love song on my facebook (which of course no one who wasn't my friend could see, so none of his other women would know) and I started noticing he would re-use the same songs on me because they worked on me once before to get me to forgive him. It's like he had a specific list of songs to use on women.
Any of this seem familiar? Or anything that you've thought of that was weird, quirky, or creepy with your P that you realized after?
In this instance my socio and my mom watched a movie, late at night when they were the only two awake. I don't remember the title, but it's about a girl who's somehow held in a basement. She's raped and tortured, and the people doing it want her sister to take part. The victim tells the sister it's okay if she hurts her, so that the same thing doesn't happen to the sister. There was also a book about it.
The socio made comments during the movie to my mom, who was a rape victim both during her childhood and later in life. Anyway my sister would say things about how she wanted to be raped, etc. My mom said she wanted to change the channel, but she can't walk well so she couldn't just get the remote herself, and my socio refused.
After that my socio made several comments, spanning a week or so, to my mom about reading the book, and how the writer really knew how to write a scene, things of that nature. They seemed so innocuous on their own. Until I learned the first half of the story.
I made it stop but it took a huge argument that spanned weeks, some masterful manipulating, distraction, and a literal knockdown drag out fight.