Someone who is as interested in you as you are in them would show you that affection with words. They'll do anything to get back with you. They'll call you in a heartbeat to hear your voice!!! He'll set up a meeting with you for coffee!!! They won't just send you emoticons of sad faces, cry faces or broken hearts. They'll strive to get you back!!! He doesn't sound lonesome to me just how you describe your situation. He's playing his game, again, and he knows he has you hooked so he just says the same thing you say or messages similar things. I don't trust him! And you shouldn't trust him either! Don't fall for any of it. He's a total fake! I totally understand how you feel, tho, and it's normal. You need to find the strength to stay away from him. He's not real, Johnny!

Mine did say he'd do anything to fix this. I told him to find a therapist and he did. But he was hoping to fool the therapist as well I bet. Then I found out that everything about him was a lie. I confronted him and told him he was a sociopath and has been pathologically lying to me from day 1. I haven't heard from him since. 10 days. What i noticed that last week is that he'd apologize again and again but never said anything about how much he'd hurt me. Didn't take responsibility for it. Didn't explain it. Just kept saying he was sorry and he wanted to fix this. I felt like he was just sorry that he was losing me. He wasn't sorry at all for what he did to me (rape). All of his msgs were basically how he was just upset that he had lost me. Not for how much he traumatized me. I want answers so bad. I want him to take responsibility for all his lies. But I know he is incapable of it. He is incapable of honesty. He is incapable of remorse. He immediately got back on dating sites (which I am having him removed from) to start hunting for his next victim. It's all just a game to him. He doesn't care how many lives he destroys.

Thanks Yve63. I know he is so toxic. I've gone through breakups before, but this is one of the toughest. I hate him, but i Love him. He's the only one i ever kept notes on. All i need to do is read the notes to realize what terrible things he did to me. its crazy. I'm pretty sure I wont ever meet with him again, I'm just in a very weak place right now. Thank you for the kick in the pants lol :)

AgentSmith my breakup was similar. He would text (text only no phone calls) "I'm sorry" I'm so sorry" with the appropriate emoji and thats it!! On the day of the breakup I took him home. He was blabbering about how he always sabotages his life, but no apology for the deceit, lies, steeling, and cheating. He was more upset that he got caught. The very next day he wanted to know if i was still taking him to Las Vegas, what an idiot. Why i have feelings for him is a mystery. I hope soon i'll stop thinking about him and move on. I'm just stuck.

Sometimes it just feels good to pour some alcohol on the open wound. I don't know why we do it but it kind of "hurts so good" and gives us some sort of self-humiliating rush. Maybe it is just an "am I really alive?" reality check. I always feel bad afterwards but it is some sort of fix that will hopefully, in time, stop working for us so we can move on. Hope that helps :)

I'm feeling weak today also....it takes every ounce of strength I have not to call him some days! I don't.... thank God but it can be such a struggle in my heart and mind!

Johnny, it struck me with your comment about how he berated himself for always screwing up. The poor martyr routine til the end. lol. Please resist any temptation to be in contact with him. It is so much easier if there is complete no contact. You will thank yourself later. Do not beat yourself up for a slip up though. Just begin again tomorrow....it is a new day. Try to get out with friends, get real busy with work, anything to keep your mind occupied and off the creep. When my S seeps into my mind, I think.....this is what he would want is for me to be thinking about him....and then I force myself to stop because he is not getting what he wants anymore! The worst revenge you can have is to have him not matter. It does not happen over night but it will. I am six months out from D-day (and it really did happen in one day) and I am doing a lot better than even a couple months ago. The old saying that it just takes time is so true. Be kind to yourself and know that it will get better. Sending peaceful thoughts your way.

They mirror you, and they project what they do and want onto you. So, you think you are getting what a reasonable person would feel, but really they are just shooting what you feel right back at ya. Mine tried to send emails with various romantic attempts, including songs, something he never did in the relationship.

They do feel sorry -- for themselves, not for you -- and they do cry and seem pathetic and needing help. The do need help, but they won't take it. They play the pity play, because they know if you care, and you do, you'll want to help them. They only cry when they are upset about what they have done to themselves, never for anyone else's pain. Normal people, of course, assume the crying is over the lost relationship.

They'll use any hook that works to get you back. They'll try different ones until they find the one that works.

We all have our weak moments, or our one step back after two steps forward. But then, remember the 8 texts from 8 different men, and they ways you were treated by him. It'll get easier to not return those calls or texts.

Thanks everybody. I'm feeling stronger today. Reading all the comments helped me get back on track. Whenever i talk to a friend or to about this they don't get it. I think they should teach children about P&S's in school, at least the warning signs. How about a special school bus just for them, hahaha that would make a good reality TV show lol.
Psychopaths and Sociopaths are the aliens among us.
I was thinking last night- Ive had breakups before but the hardest breakups to get over were the ones where the partner lied and deceived. Those breakups took the longest to heal. Im looking forward to a productive day today. No weepy moments!!!!, Stand tall, and walk forward:)

Johnny, I've been saying the same thing for years! They need to teach this in schools. It's such a huge problem in society yet NOBODY knows anything about it. Nobody knows how common they are. Nobody knows the signs to look for. Nobody has any clue what a psychopath is. They think it's the crazy serial killer they see in movies. It's so frustrating.

I agree Johnny & Agent! They need to teach this in schools. Lately, I've gotten to the point where I've sat down with my children and talked to them about people. I explained to them that we're not all the same. My poor kids have taken over my personality of being too kind and loving with big hearts of gold. They think there is no evil in this world. I wish someone would of had sat down with me at a young age and told me these things. I would of had avoided meeting these "aliens". Well, I'm doing this now with my kids because I know no one else will, and I don't want them to become victims. Although these kind of people still trick you. I learned in Psychology class last night that it takes about 3 to 5 years to get to know someone really well because all of their true colors come out by then. In my experiences, it's taken less than a year. There should be something out there beside Sex Ed classes that teaches about disorders and red flags. I agree!!!

Johnny I know you miss him but sadly they are all words. It hurts but its the truth. I loved mine too but hate him in a not really hate way, how can one hate someone they miss....but yes I understand what you mean, its how we feel. They screw us up badly. Mine said the same "that he was heartbroken, that I had broke his heart. Even all he my exS said even after this...to keep on mirroring me and lying, as I found out for good in the end...and how he missed me and loved me, he still kept doing the same repeated behavior. I was weak too, but know that you will be stronger. This r/s are indeed the worse to get over. Its beyond any normal r/s.

these r/s are the hardest to get over because they are so deceptive.

They always come back as long as they think we are and can be useful. If not useful in "any" way "anymore", then when not useful they drop us like a hot potato, no locking back, they usually vanish till maybe some months or years later. Mine knows I am not useful anymore, but it wouldnt surprise me he will be back more times, he has been back 4 times now and said the same each time in anger when not getting his way. Why should I believe he is gone for good now. Dont fall for his words and tricks Johnny, its only to try put the wool over or eyes, once again. Forever of they can :(

They do not talk things out or think about this like we do, because they are sociopaths.