There are environmental factors that play a role in their disorder according to experts , but that's not all.
I mean I felt a lot of empathy for him, but the circumstances don't justify his behavior. People go through hard things and don't become psychopaths. He didn't have the greatest relationship with his mother. He was religious.It did effect his relationships with women and his actions, but it wasn't the cause.

I'm not justifying the actions at all! It is no excuse - we all had some trauma and how it plays out is different for everyone. My ex had no early attachments. I just know this had a big role in him becoming who he is but no means does it make it ok. If anything he could've gone the opposite and made it a point to never hurt anyone or abandon anyone like was done to him. In his case he used his past as a way to manipulate and forever and ever look like the poor little victim.

Oh, I understood what you meant and said I felt sorry for him like you did. Psychopaths "confess"" a lot from what I know, but it doesn't mean they feel pain ore remorse or fear or whatever normal emotion. They use the confession to press other people's emotional buttons.
I do think he divides women to madona's and whores and loves the whores and abuses the madona's because that's his retaliation towards his mother.

Yes! My ex told me numerous times that he hated women. His birth mother was the first to let him down and give him up and that started the pattern of hatred towards women. He is obsessed with praise and admiration of women but hates and resents them deeply.
And yep, my ex told me all about his sexual abuse within like two weeks of knowing him. THAT was a red flag for me that I ignored. I felt very uneasy with someone so freely disclosing such painful information to me. I found it very very odd and disconcerting. He has done the same with all women.

Some say psychopaths were hit and have some sort of brain injuries from childhood, there a lot of factors.
He had zero emotion when he spoke about these things, because he's not really dealing with them. The person who hears his confessions is.

Yeah I think because of my education and professional background I wasn't quite as "shocked" and horrified as some women. He was always threatening suicide and using his past as a crutch for being a piece of crap. Now the OW told me that when he first told her about feeling suicidal, "she sobbed and sobbed". Yeah, he needs that level of reaction - I bet he loved that she did that. With me, I just didn't really ever believe it so I'd always listen but he didn't get a big reaction out of me.

I think that's part of them preparing the victim for sexual intimacy "let me tell you about my childhood, make you feel like we are close and then I can get in your pants and wherever I want to get into it".

The dad was an enabler in both of the psychopaths lives. The mom was cold. She made them feel like nothing they do is good enough. She wasn't nurturing.

By the way I find it creepy that you tried to warn the OW and she told you what they did when they were together and then got back to him.
My relationship with the other woman is great. Never seen her, Never going to speak to her. She smears me on social media and talks about the distress of her boyfriend caused by me. Poor things they don't know how pathetic they look from the side to people who know the truth and have the guts to face it.

Yep. She contacted me and I told her all about him. She's now got a great guy and hope she feels really good about the person she is daring her life with and her kids life with. She's stupid but addicted. He convinced her only loved her etc. Pretty sad.

it's sad , because they never victimize once inspite of all the crazy , unstable ex- s they claim there are in the world.
But you are free from the responsibility for what he does.Because you have warned her.
I didn't bother with the OW of mine, I warned an old ex and she started protecting herself from me on Facebook as though I was attacking her.
I had a feeling I was talking to a very dangerous and manipulative man the last time I spoke to him on the phone, now it's up to society.

Yes Dana you are right. Forget them. They will know what you mean one day when it happens to them.
I warned her only because she reached out to me and asked. When I caught wind she was back.with him I ended all conversation on the spot. I'm done with both of them. They can have each other. I got a great and amazing kid out of the deal. I won.

Oh I am sure she knows and she doesn't care because she's like him. I was struck by the similarity.
My psychopath got stuck in time. He is still a child in his mind even though he's 53.

I think she cares but she still believes she is special. The one and only female that he can truly love and change for. Unfortunately he's already lied about his whole life and cheated on her numerous times - both of which she knows - so I'm not banking on him doing any changing for her. And if he does, well good for him, maybe he'll step up and acknowledge our child then.

The new woman knows. It doesn't take long for an intelligent woman to see what a guy is all about. They just decide whether they are going to continue to see him. I was contacted by a woman who dated a guy I met in front of mutual neighbors' home. He lived down the street from me for 3 years and I never saw him before!!!

Anyhow, when she found out he was seeing me, she started writing me typed letters about his imperfections, etc. She lives in Phila., and I am in MD, so I never met her.

It got worse over time, and I contacted the police. They told me he was the problem. At first I didn't get it, but then it made sense. When he finally told her never to contact him ever again, she left me alone! It took over 5 years! Stalkers are sick to say the least!

Hope you are doing well and have a great weekend.

So she stalked you? Yikes. Such sick triangulations.

My ex had a history of abuse in childhood too. He never told me about sexual abuse but I have a feeling something may have happened. Like your ex though mine had issues with women, his mother was overinvolved in his life but wasn't emotionally close to him.

When my ex was born he told me the family were mourning the death of his baby brother who had been treated for cancer. His mother hit the bottle, my ex said he felt like he'd had 'too much space' when he was young. My ex was bullied at school and refused to attend, his father beat him with a belt and put him in a dog cage at the back of his truck and took him to school where my ex arrived like a wild animal and punched the head teacher in the face. There is more, much more but you get the picture.

Sadly all this is true, men who grow up with abuse tend to become abusers (statistically) and this was true of my ex. He'd learned that men have the right and power to be violent, I believe he deeply resented his mother for not protecting him

I was told his story of childhood (as we're ALL