I would stay away from this person!! She could be either. Someone I loved committed suicide bc some crazy sociopath manipulated him into feeling sorry for her and used him, abused him, then robbed him and harrassed him until he went over the edge. I'm sure she enjoyed his suffering bc these people are SICK!

You know she is a liar so why get sucked in? Protect yourself and move onto someone honest! Spare yourself the agony and deception!

I did cut this person off several weeks ago, even before I discovered the full extent of the lies she told me. But now, even after the passage of some time, I find myself feeling nostalgia for the days when I believed the lies she told me and thought that I was actually loved by an incredible person. Is that normal?

ya thats normal because they find ways to "hook you" to get you to become addicted to interaction with them. they tell you everything you want to hear during this time. it becomes almost impossible for you to do no contact because you continue to miss them, its like breaking an addiction

It is like breaking an addiction. The amount of contact and the emotional manipulation was so extreme, that it is hard to just quit "cold turkey." But it's been 2 1/2 months, and I have resisted all the temptations to get back in touch. I wish I could just stop thinking about her and do what my friends advise -- "move on."

It's astonishing sometimes what power one person can hold over another. I think it comes from the inner yearning we have to find someone who loves us for who we really are. Don't underestimate the power of that hook.

Thank you for the words of support. This person repeatedly professed her love for me in the most passionate and devoted terms. It was exactly what I wanted to hear. However, it was all part of a larger game based on lies and manipulation. She had extreme mood swings. I don't think they were part of the act. She would go from loving, kind and generous to acting like a wounded animal with no provocation. I've read elsewhere on this site that these mood extremes are characteristic of psychopaths.

So, the Catfish finally figured out a way to contact me. She sent me a message saying that she, although she had been hospitalized "for weeks," she was now better, had found the love of her life, had finally made love and was now happy. She wished me happiness. I called her and said that, in order for us to have any communications in the future, she would have to admit the lies she had told me and apologize for them. I spelled out the biggest ones. All she could say in response is that she "just wants me to be happy" and a vague statement asking me if I always told the truth. In other words, she would not take responsibility for the lies. I kept pressing her with specifics. She asked to end the conversation. I obliged.

I feel good that I stood up to her and refused to let things be "business as usual." On the other hand, even responding to her at all was probably giving in to manipulative behavior. Should I expect that she will keep trying to contact me?

not everyone who is an asshole is a sociopath. but someone who does that, lies and pretends to be something and someone else is not someone you want near you. be very careful who you interact with online, there are a lot of very bad predators of all kinds online.

Good advice. Thank you. My judgment is so clouded right now. From the brief interaction yesterday, it seemed that this person was more delusional than malicious, but who really knows. I have a natural tendency to express empathy and sympathy and am vulnerable to being manipulated because of that.

It sometimes happens that Ps will fake illness, even serious illness, for a variety of purposes. Often, it is to obtain money for the supposed treatments. It can be for the attention. It can be to explain prolonged absences, perhaps while they see someone else. Or it can explain why they just can't work. From what you say, it sounds like this illness was faked or exaggerated.

The question about whether you always tell the truth is strange, and sounds to me like throwing blame elsewhere, something that Ps and Ns often do.

In general, how you define "catfish" sounds to me more like a narcissist (N or NPD) than a psychopath (P), but it could be either, or just strongly in the direction of either.

avram 1965, we all do its not something to feel about. we all seem to be pretty sensative, just be careful, recognize it in yourself and learn what boundaries are, the internet is a playground for psychos i believe its where they do what they do best because they can hide behind a screen and tell you everything you want to hear and when your nature is to trust we are a perfect target. its not about if it will happen its about when and how many times. ive taken polls asking where we all met our SPN's and almost all were online. dont befriend people you dont know and if your going to date someone check there name out, spokeo will show you how many websites and alias's they use and other information , google there name see what comes up, if they are on millions of sites or better yet go there and search for them and look at their profiles, if everything is private, or they wont let you do a friend request with them, or they have a few alias's etc....red flags. just remember there are sick bored people out there with nothing better to do than destroy your life. keep your eyes open and your heart intack. if it seems to good to be true it most likely is. take it from me i learned the hard way. just be glad this person didnt get everything you have ever owned or every dime to your name. good luck

This Catfish played the illness card to the hilt. She was the administrator of a Facebook group for people with chronic illnesses that has over 12,000 members. I have no doubt she has some illness, but she claimed to have over 10 serious conditions, one of which I had and that only occurs in 1 in 100,000 people.

So, she used the common illness originally and them amped up the sympathy by claiming to have been in abusive relationships, to have lost close family members and suffered a traumatic brain injury. Some of that may be true, but clearly not all. After the illness and sympathy cards were played, the sex card came out -- the brain injury resulted in "hypersexuality." Then she sent photos and videos taken from others' websites. She also portrayed herself as rich beyond measure. Imagine, a stunning, physically perfect 30 year-old with an unlimited sex drive and tons of money, who was also a sympathetic figure. If it's too good to be true...but she was clever. She tempered all of the good qualities with all of the illnesses. She also had almost manic mood swings, but I don't think those were faked.

When the claims got too outlandish, I tried to break off all contact. She persisted, so I went to the Police. They wouldn't give me a restraining order, but did give me tips on online research sources. That is how I learned the truth about this person.

This person could have destroyed my life. I am thankful I woke up in time. The scars will heal, but they are pretty raw now. Thank you for the support. Just knowing that I'm not the only idiot who has fallen for something like this is comforting.

your not an idiot you just thought you could trust and you cant unfortunately, not until your sure of who they are and you have seen them in person a million times and the words match up the acts. but your not an idiot. none of are. p prefer to say naive lol just be careful and im glad u got out before everything was lost. thank god

I could have lost my family, my friends, my money, my job and certainly my ability to have anyone respect me. I never met this person. All of our contact was online and on the phone. She would never Skype, and it took a long time for the reason for that to dawn on me -- she is a 50 year-old woman pretending to be 30 and using pictures of a model who is even younger. It almost sounds like she got the idea from the movie, Catfish.

Thank you for your words of support and encouragement.