Urinary Incontinence Support Group
Urinary incontinence is the involuntary excretion of urine from one's body. It is often temporary, and it almost always results from an underlying medical condition. Stress, functional, and urge incontinence are the most common forms. Share with other support group members and learn from their stories and experiences.
Hi Everyone,
I wanted to share an experience that happened yesterday and get some impressions from folks that may have dealt with something similar. I had to go to a Dermatology appointment for the first time ever (so new patient) to be evaluated for psoriasis which my doctor believes is causing Psoriatic Arthritis (swelling and pain in my joints). I knew I was going to need to remove most of my clothing as I have skin lesions on most areas of my body now. I've dealt with doctors and nurses seeing me in a diaper as well as massage therapists and the acupuncture person I've been working with. I told myself, "This is no big deal, they've seen this before". I thought I was prepared for whole experience.
So, the Dermatologist has me remove my gown and he looked kinda shocked when he saw that I was wearing a diaper. Now he didn't comment on it, nor did the nurse who was with him and I had written that I had incontinence issues in my new patient paperwork. But I swear it felt like all the air got sucked out of the room. All he said was, "Stand up and lets take a look at your skin". He begins his exam and looking me over from head to toe with his nurse/doctor's assistant standing next to me taking notes. He asked me to turn around so he could see my back since I had reported the worst of the skin lesions were on the back of legs where my chair rubs them and on my shoulders. He then, with no warning whatsoever, sticks his ICE COLD hands down the back of the diaper to pull it down so he can see my bottom. Rather than asking me to take it off or lower it, he just did it. The problem came when my body reacted to shock as it does and my bladder let go. Not a lot but enough to make me yell "Pull it up! Pull it up!" and I just swat his hands out of the way and pull the diaper back up as best I could, but not before leaking a little bit on the floor.
Now, he did apologize briefly and said, "don't worry about it" and the nurse offered to get me a new diaper. I was mortified by the experience and my read on them was that they were both really uncomfortable both before *it* happened and then after. I've shared this with a close friend of mine and she and I both think that the Doc may have chosen not to say anything to me before pulling the diaper down in order to show that he was protecting my dignity but I can't escape the notion that it would have been so much better (for all of us)if he had just said, "Could you please lower that or take it off for a minute?" rather than doing it himself without saying anything. I did find him to be supportive of the issue for which I am seeing him (the skin) and we did all eventually kind of just move on as though nothing had happened. I'm going to have to go back for a follow up in a couple of months and I'm mulling over whether or not I'm going to offer this feedback to him or just let "sleeping dogs lie". I know I'm much more sensitive about this issue than probably any person, including a doctor, who doesn't have to deal with it might be.
Thanks in advance for any input you all may have.
-CJ
I wanted to share an experience that happened yesterday and get some impressions from folks that may have dealt with something similar. I had to go to a Dermatology appointment for the first time ever (so new patient) to be evaluated for psoriasis which my doctor believes is causing Psoriatic Arthritis (swelling and pain in my joints). I knew I was going to need to remove most of my clothing as I have skin lesions on most areas of my body now. I've dealt with doctors and nurses seeing me in a diaper as well as massage therapists and the acupuncture person I've been working with. I told myself, "This is no big deal, they've seen this before". I thought I was prepared for whole experience.
So, the Dermatologist has me remove my gown and he looked kinda shocked when he saw that I was wearing a diaper. Now he didn't comment on it, nor did the nurse who was with him and I had written that I had incontinence issues in my new patient paperwork. But I swear it felt like all the air got sucked out of the room. All he said was, "Stand up and lets take a look at your skin". He begins his exam and looking me over from head to toe with his nurse/doctor's assistant standing next to me taking notes. He asked me to turn around so he could see my back since I had reported the worst of the skin lesions were on the back of legs where my chair rubs them and on my shoulders. He then, with no warning whatsoever, sticks his ICE COLD hands down the back of the diaper to pull it down so he can see my bottom. Rather than asking me to take it off or lower it, he just did it. The problem came when my body reacted to shock as it does and my bladder let go. Not a lot but enough to make me yell "Pull it up! Pull it up!" and I just swat his hands out of the way and pull the diaper back up as best I could, but not before leaking a little bit on the floor.
Now, he did apologize briefly and said, "don't worry about it" and the nurse offered to get me a new diaper. I was mortified by the experience and my read on them was that they were both really uncomfortable both before *it* happened and then after. I've shared this with a close friend of mine and she and I both think that the Doc may have chosen not to say anything to me before pulling the diaper down in order to show that he was protecting my dignity but I can't escape the notion that it would have been so much better (for all of us)if he had just said, "Could you please lower that or take it off for a minute?" rather than doing it himself without saying anything. I did find him to be supportive of the issue for which I am seeing him (the skin) and we did all eventually kind of just move on as though nothing had happened. I'm going to have to go back for a follow up in a couple of months and I'm mulling over whether or not I'm going to offer this feedback to him or just let "sleeping dogs lie". I know I'm much more sensitive about this issue than probably any person, including a doctor, who doesn't have to deal with it might be.
Thanks in advance for any input you all may have.
-CJ
I had a situation once with a urologist who actually seemed both disturbed and put off by the fact that I was wearing a diaper (talk about job fit issues!). At the end of the second visit I mentioned this to him, my perception that it made him uncomfortable. He offered denials but I persisted and he admitted that it did make him mildly uncomfortable and embarrassed especially since we were the same age (about 30). I explained that despite my outward demeanor I was embarrassed by it too but that it was simply something I had to deal with.
That short conversation cleared the air and after that our relationship was less tense and more communicative.
Good luck!
We eventually developed an understanding - but remember, they work for you - not the other way around. Don't be afraid at all to tell them side issues you want them to be aware of, issues you don't want them addressing or getting involved in, or how something they do or say makes you feel.
I've found that when I do this tactfully and respectfully, but if needed firmly, I get my personal wishes and sensitivities respected and understood.
Best wishes to you!
As a bit of an update, I saw my new Rheumatologist for the first time a couple days ago and this doctor handled the whole thing beautifully. Was nice to have a meeting with a new Doc go so smoothly.
Thanks,
CJ