Trying To Conceive Support Group

Whether you are just beginning your journey to create your family, or you have been trying for a few months, the TTC community will provide you with a group of like minded people who can help. It takes up to a year for the average fertile couple to achieve a successful pregnancy, and here at DailyStrength you will find information and support while you are waiting for...

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/ Trying To Conceive Support Group

Trying to stay positive...isn't always easy

missylala
missylala

Hi all-


I'm brand new to this group, but happy I found it. I'm 38, my husband is 40. We've been ttc for a couple of years, but really only got "serious" about it in the last six months. I had two surgeries to remove a large fibroid from my uterus this past August and September. Other than that all my bloodwork, ultrasounds, genetic testing, etc. all looks good. My husband's sperm anaylis checked out as well. Last month we did our first round of Clomid with a trigger shot, and tried on our own and followed that with progesteron suppositories. Today I got my period (two days late), and I'm sad. Originally my doc said if I didn't get pregnant this last cycle, we'd do another round of Clomid with a trigger, and time that with an IUI. Today they called and want me to go in for a cyst check on Monday. 


I'm very aware that this is just the beginning for us, and that other couples have had to overcome so much more adversity than we have. I wouldn't even consider this real "adversity" at all. It's just hard when I feel like time is running out and it's baby announcement after baby announcement from everyone but me. And I'm starting to feel left out, like everyone is in this mom's club that I don't have access to. 


I just wanted to find a place where I could commisterate. My husband is amazing, but telling me it will be okay and we'll get pregnant doesn't always help. He means well. I appreciate that. 

kkanemck
kkanemck
Hi, I too am looking for someone to commiserate
missylala
missylala
It's tough, right? And the canned responses get a little old, "it'll happen when you aren't trying...", "you just need to relax...", etc.
kkanemck
kkanemck
Yea, Recently someone actually said to me "well at least you've already got 1 child"
missylala
missylala
What??? People are ridiculous! When I was young and single, I was going through a break-up and my dad said "there's other fish in the sea..." Bless him, he tried. People just don't know what to say in uncomfortable situations.
kkanemck
kkanemck
Well, I had to go through 2 IVF's before getting my baby boy on our 3rd try. I think one thing that helped me not stress was telling my closest girlfriends all the crazy things I had to go through. They couldn't understand it but they were so floored by what IVF takes that they stopped saying stupid things, at least for a little while. Haha. I hope your cyst check on Monday goes smoothly and you can move on to the next step :)
hopefulmommytobe
hopefulmommytobe
I completely understand what you are going through. It can be difficult to truly put into words what you may be feeling about infertility with family and friends who might not completely understand. That is one thing I love about this group, it is nice to feel a sense of community with people who totally understand when you feel frustrated or down. Hang in there, little mommy! It will happen for you soon, I truly believe that. Better to get those cysts out of the way before you become pregnant anyways! (:
mukkam
mukkam
Hey girl,

I totally agree, husbands comfort sometimes just isn't enough. I think that a man's initial thought is "it's the woman's fault" which is quite annoying because it could definitely be the man's swimmers or lack there of. I have been trying for months now and something I thought would be so easy is NOT lol, I mean it makes me wish I was stupid and got prego in highschool because I'm sure I'd have no problem then. As an adult we have to realize that stress is always higher because we have to "adult" and it never gets easier unless we are millionaires lol. I think if we could eliminate some unnecessary stress from our lives and maybe join like a yoga class or something once or twice a week to try to clear our minds, we might lessen some stress if only for an hour. I think that is something I am going to try anywhoo. Good luck to you, and all the other ladies in this struggle. Much love sister!

-Mal
missylala
missylala
You ladies are the best...it's nice to know others get me and how I feel. We did an IUI a little over a week ago, so now it's the waiting game. In the meantime, I'm finding all of the maternity posts in my Facebook newsfeed particularly smug and annoying. It's probably just my mood from all the hormones I'm putting in my body, but it still annoys me! Ha! My doc says I can take a pregnancy test on Friday - fingers crossed!!!!

Love to you all!
mkantrim
mkantrim
I know exactly how you feel! I am 38 and my husband is 46. We have been trying for a year and a half, no major issues aside from a fibroid removed last year in May. He tested out okay and all my bloodwork, etc has also been fine. I had a miscarriage last Oct and we are now on our 2nd round of Clomid. I just started my period today, cried early this morning when I realized another month has gone by with not conceiving. My assistant got pregnant right after I did (then I mc'd) and she is due in a couple more months. It is SO hard watching her belly grow and knowing that it could of been me. My husband is also incredible and super supportive. They still don't fully grasp why we are upset though...and everyone we know keeps saying we have time, that we just need to relax, etc. We just talked about going to the Fertility Clinic next month (my OB/GYN prescribed the Clomid). Wishing you success for Friday and it is good for my heart to know I am not alone even though sometimes it feels that way.
missylala
missylala
I'm so sorry to hear of your miscarriage. Hopefully you can take comfort in know that you were able to get pregnant and you will again. Aside from the mc, we're in the same situation - I had a fibroid removed in August, and a second surgery in September to get the rest of it out. This past month was my second round of clomid, and I've responded well to it, my bloodwork is good, husband's sperm sample checked out - so it's a little frustrating with each passing month, but I know it'll happen so it keeps me going. I have big hips...God wouldn't have given this booty to me if I wasn't supposed to deliver a baby! :) Last month I cried when I got my period, I let myself be sad - then put a plan in action with my doctor. And if I have to this month, I'll cry again and put another plan in motion. I'll be 39 in August, so I do feel like time is of the essence - and if one more person tells me to relax and that I'm still young enough, I may punch them in the face. At least my doc keeps it real - every month she says "you need to go for it, you're 38!" I appreciate her honesty. Stay positive, lady! Your little one is out there, he or she (or them) just haven't found you quite yet - but they will!