My whole life I've told myself that I have a very strong memory. I can go to places in my head and feel like I'm really there, and even recall smells from decades ago that I haven't thought of in just as long. At first I thought everyone was like this, and gradually learned I was different. 

My memories go back to age 1-2. I have a good 50 to 100 strong memories of this time (I lived in an entirely different area that I ended up moving from at age 2, and I have fairly recently confirmed certain memories with my mother that she was astonished I remembered). I have thousands of memories from throughout my entire life, many extremely vivid. 

I have always understood to some degree that my lifelong emotional problems stemmed from certain circumstances that happened from my earliest memories. The things that I remember I will never forget, and they have caused me constant anxiety, eventually leading to other issues as I grew older. I never felt like I could tell anyone about those specific memories, even my mom. They felt taboo in some way and also too painful to really talk about. So I went through my life constantly plagued by these memories, all the while my mom thought I had forgotten, and the issues went unaddressed. My very good memory continued to collect memories. Good, bad, and trivial. Constantly, especially at night, I revisited a handful of memories at a time. The early, worst memories mostly came at night and would lead me to bouts of fear and crying. At night they felt real, and I didn't feel safe. 

After finally opening up to certain people and therapists about these memories, what was probably obvious, but wasn't to me as I've lived my whole life with this problem. That these worst memories were probably a traumatic experience that "woke me up" to setting memories at an earlier age than most. What was most surprising was recently when my therapist suggested my memories were "flashbacks". I have always described them, even the good memories, as that I felt like they were happening at the same time as real life, that sometimes I would get confused as to which time was reality, and that I started to believe that my whole life was happening at the same time. Often my mind will flip from one memory to another so quickly that it feels like my brain is channel surfing.  It never occurred to me that these could be flashbacks because I was so used to what you see in movies. I apologize if what I'm describing is not flashbacks and I'm offending anyone. I've just never been able to talk about this to anyone who understands.