Hi, I'm new to this community but not new to this condition. I'm 22 and I've been pulling as long as I can remember, as early as 5 at least. This last year has been the first year I've been able to open up to anyone in my life about it, but I still struggle accepting it sometimes. I'm just here to know that I'm not alone. That other people feel what I feel, do what I do, and can still be productive human beings.
I think this is a very important factor of any impulse control disorder. What happens if you pull away from any particular moment of great urge and temptation?I have been trying to explore this aspect recently. It's been difficult to tug myself out of the strong need to self harm, but when I do...it is only if I insist that I am doing it for my well being. I have to talk myself out of the desire...
I was the designated scapegoat in my dysfunctional family system from childhood through age 52 as an adult, so I know the bitterness of unfair dysfunctional family disappointment. I was an honors student when I lived at home, and when I went to college I got a rare Fulbright Scholarship which would have made any parent proud. But I got nothing but criticism and ridiculous attacks on my...
Feeling lost and scared. I can't control my sadness. Not that I really want to control it, but I don't know how to come out of it anymore. I'm scared of this darkness. I don't want it anymore.