Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling) Support Group
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My name is (not actually) Katalina, and I've had trich since eighth grade. I'm now fifteen, and I'm currently seeing a therapist and talking a lot with my mom. While both are helpful, I just feel like neither of them understand what I feel like. They both seem to be very stuck under the impression that I want to pull and I choose to pull and if I just want to stop hard enough, I will.
I have no hair on the top of my head (think monk) and thin, patchy eyelashes. I hate what I do to myself. I have a dance recital next week that requires a very specific hairstyle; I don't have enough hair to do it and we had to buy a very expensive and very ugly hairpiece so I won't be half bald. My therapist told me (nicely) that hopefully this will be a wake- up call and motivation to stop. No one seems to get that I can't seem to get motivated to stop. I feel ugly (I feel like I'm a very nice person on the inside, where it counts, but not on the outside) and even that can't make me stop.
I'm frustrated that no one seems to get it. Fortunately, I have found all you lovely people who do. So, thank you already for making me feel not alone.
I have no hair on the top of my head (think monk) and thin, patchy eyelashes. I hate what I do to myself. I have a dance recital next week that requires a very specific hairstyle; I don't have enough hair to do it and we had to buy a very expensive and very ugly hairpiece so I won't be half bald. My therapist told me (nicely) that hopefully this will be a wake- up call and motivation to stop. No one seems to get that I can't seem to get motivated to stop. I feel ugly (I feel like I'm a very nice person on the inside, where it counts, but not on the outside) and even that can't make me stop.
I'm frustrated that no one seems to get it. Fortunately, I have found all you lovely people who do. So, thank you already for making me feel not alone.
I totally know what you're going through. My first therapist diagnosed me as bipolar because she didn't know what trich was and assumed my pulling was due to a manic phase. She was SO wrong. My mother also didn't understand at the time. That was 15-20 years ago...
But now, there are so many studies and resources out there, that you should not have to deal with an ignorant therapist.
You need to find a new therapist to treat you. One who actually understands that this isn't about willpower. The TLC site (www.trich.org) is a great resource to show your mother to help her understand why it is important for you to see a therapist who actually KNOWS that trich isn't just a bad habit and knows that it takes more than motivation to stop pulling.
Hope you can find a therapist who is up to date on the current treatment options for trich soon!
For starts, I always was messing with something when I was younger. I would pull out pillow feathers from all of my pillows, until i felt bored. I remember one day I did it for so long, but then I decided it wasn't good enough, so I got scissors and actually cut the pillow open, allowing me to get all the feathers out that I wanted. I was 5. this habit stopped.
second grade- I started to pull out my eyelashes hearing they could give you wishes. It became a habit.
In the fifth grade, I remember always getting in trouble for messing with my hair, and occasionally pulling out full strands. I am not in 8th grade. I have become utterly obsessed with pulling out my hair, feeling it, cutting off and picking off the split ends. My parents go insane, my friends and teachers think i'm a freak. it's annoying and getting out of hand, but I just can't stop!! What should I do?
Alex- Isn't it wonderful how life has decided that being a teenager isn't hard enough and makes us deal with this? My trich seems to fluctuate a lot, I went through a phase where I just snapped my hair like crazy, picking at split ends, so i know exactly what you mean. I have a few ideas: First, if you constantly blow dry/ curl/ straighten your hair, consider doing it less. This will help cut down on the split ends. You could also get a haircut to trim off some of them. If you don't have very many split ends, though, that probably won't help.Obviously, keeping your hair up in a bun will help keep your hands out of it, although it needs to be tight enough that you can't tug strands out and start playing with them. Also, in some situations, you can pick, tie knots in, or play with other stuff, like yarn or string. I like Silly Putty because you can snap it and stretch it. This doesn't fly very well at school, so I had a bracelet that I fiddled with and pulled apart then put back together (until my brother broke it) and that was helpful. Nothing quite replaces the feeling of pulling/picking at hair, but they still help a little.
Most of all, know that you aren't alone in this and it in no way changes who you are.
Hope this helps!