The Tea Room Community Group
This is a private group by invitation only. It is a group for those who have a loved one with a brain injury. This group was not founded by me but I will serve as the founder temporarily as one of the first members.
I think that this maybe probably the worst part of my sons injury. Yes there are a lot of other things but impulsivity is what gets him in trouble the most. If this were not a problem he would not have started using drugs, would not feel the need to steal and lie. Yesterday he borrowed ( stole) my hubbys truck. Yes he did ask but his Dad told him no. While Dad was in the shower his took his keys and got the spare key ring out of the truck. He used while his dad went to work. His excuse was that he needed to go to the store and did not want to walk........weather is very nice here so that excuse will not fly. I am so pissed that he just keeps on making this crappy choices over and over again. We were just starting to think that maybe we should give him some slack and try trusting him a bit. Well no way that is happening now. It is funny because he actually sees nothing wrong with what he did. How is that even possible ? I just dont get it and probably never will. There are so many things that I am afraid that I am not either willing or capable of dealing with for the rest of my life. I just want my good son back, I dont want this other person that has taken over his body. grrrrrr
Well thats my rant for the day. I hope that all I have to complain about for a while. It always seems that when my hubby and I are planning to go away for a couple of nights he pulls some kind of crap. Then I just cannot enjoy and relax..........I will be waiting for something bad to happen and it usually does.
hugs...pam
Well thats my rant for the day. I hope that all I have to complain about for a while. It always seems that when my hubby and I are planning to go away for a couple of nights he pulls some kind of crap. Then I just cannot enjoy and relax..........I will be waiting for something bad to happen and it usually does.
hugs...pam
I'm sorry you have to go through this but if it makes you feel a teensie weensie bit better; I know what your going through. I'm here to listen and give you support when ever I can. Our golden girl has some of the same behaviors as your son.
It's not fun watching what used to be, turn in to WTF!!!!
Love & hugs.
Now I knock on wood when I say this, but a year later, things are much better. I remember one neuropsychologist we went to for testing a few years ago said that testing showed that my son *could* learn from negative consequences, but he would need a lot more repetition than others. In other words, the normal person would touch a hot stove once and never do it again; son would have to do so many times, but he'd finally catch on. We were wondering just how many arrests/underage drinking/dui's, etc. he'd have to have before he freaking got it. Hopefully this is it? My fear is that when he turns 21, he will start drinking again, and when he drinks, any and all reasonable judgment and impulse control that is left flies right out the window. But I try not to borrow trouble.
As I type this, son and dad are playing ping pong behind me. The three of us went to a quick dinner out (how romantic lol), and it's been a nice afternoon. Sadly things can and do change in a second, but for this moment, all is well.
I say all this to tell you that there is hope for change and improvement as regards impulsivity. Frontal lobe injury sucks. But there is hope...
Love and hugs, hugs, hugs,
HayMom
P.s. going away for a few nights sounds wonderful! Hopefully you will have moments when you are not waiting for the other shoe to drop, and you can just relax and enjoy!!!
My brother sent me a card last year for my birthday and he wrote that he thinks I am the strongest/bravest woman he knows. I wrote to him and said, "dont mistake strength/bravery for merely just surviving."
That pretty much sums it up.
I am going to go away for a couple of nights and I AM NOT going to worry. If my house gets burned down, my car stolen, my son has a meltdown and my other possessions missing.....oh well. I can not control everything in this world, just myself !
So on that note, I am going to be tipping my glass with cheers !
hugs...pam
Hugs!
Ps " don't mistake bravery for merely just surviving." no truer words have been said...
About the sheepish "sooorrrry" I smile and reply "I don't want to hear sorry. I need to see sorry". It usually stops him for a minute before he moves onto his next thing.