The Hen House Community Group
This Group is for Hens only. A place where we can share and flock together:) May friendships grow here.
I have a good friend and former co-worker who has been trying to quietly get out of her boyfriend's house. She and her 4 youngest children, came to the crisis point yesterday. Her kids stayed with friends and Mary had no place.
She's been coming to me often with her stories and frustrations while looking for a place to rent. The man who was so sweet and wanted to marry her, slowly turned into the abuser that everyone in town knows he is.
As soon as he knew they were done and that she planned to move out, it became volatile. She had to call the police for her safety. Now, he doesn't want her getting her things unless he's there! When she went up for immediate things that she needed today, he had put nails on the floor inside so she couldn't get in and left nasty notes all around. She found a window open so she was able to gather a few belongings, anyway.
Then...she came to me. I have been offering to be provide her 'safe place' if she needed to get out in a hurry and this is it. She was fighting tears and trying to be so brave. Mary is very smart and an amazingly strong person, but she's really beating herself up for this. I see many long talks in the days to come...she really opened up to me shortly after we met.
So...after my last 2 haircuts, I drove to a matress store and bought a new set to put in the big room she and the kids will be using. When I explained the situation, the owners said they'd deliver it after they close at 7:00 tonight. I'm going to get my Son to loan us some camping mats or cots for her 3 boys. She and her daughter can have the new bed. My Brother put the AC in the window and I vacuumed and dusted since the room has been sitting empty since my roomie moved out in April.
She's working until 8:00 and then the whole gang will be moving in...yikes. I have no idea how long they'll need to be here, but I told her to relax, regroup and take her time. There is no longer any pressure!
I'm glad I have the space to provide my friend with the safety she deserves. It might be a bit livlier around here than I've been used to, but I know in my heart, this is the right thing to do.
If you don't hear from me in the morning...send HELP! ....kidding.
Hugs and clucks...
She's been coming to me often with her stories and frustrations while looking for a place to rent. The man who was so sweet and wanted to marry her, slowly turned into the abuser that everyone in town knows he is.
As soon as he knew they were done and that she planned to move out, it became volatile. She had to call the police for her safety. Now, he doesn't want her getting her things unless he's there! When she went up for immediate things that she needed today, he had put nails on the floor inside so she couldn't get in and left nasty notes all around. She found a window open so she was able to gather a few belongings, anyway.
Then...she came to me. I have been offering to be provide her 'safe place' if she needed to get out in a hurry and this is it. She was fighting tears and trying to be so brave. Mary is very smart and an amazingly strong person, but she's really beating herself up for this. I see many long talks in the days to come...she really opened up to me shortly after we met.
So...after my last 2 haircuts, I drove to a matress store and bought a new set to put in the big room she and the kids will be using. When I explained the situation, the owners said they'd deliver it after they close at 7:00 tonight. I'm going to get my Son to loan us some camping mats or cots for her 3 boys. She and her daughter can have the new bed. My Brother put the AC in the window and I vacuumed and dusted since the room has been sitting empty since my roomie moved out in April.
She's working until 8:00 and then the whole gang will be moving in...yikes. I have no idea how long they'll need to be here, but I told her to relax, regroup and take her time. There is no longer any pressure!
I'm glad I have the space to provide my friend with the safety she deserves. It might be a bit livlier around here than I've been used to, but I know in my heart, this is the right thing to do.
If you don't hear from me in the morning...send HELP! ....kidding.
Hugs and clucks...
did she report it yesterday?
she can still go to victim's services to file a report and get police escorts to remove her things and possibly get temp housing, esp since she has children. she needs to get connected to the social service network asap.
if she can just call 311, they'll get her into the system.
i hope she''ll do this. it really needs to be on the records so she can move on.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
You are an awesome friend. Protective prayers to you and this family. So sad,so sad.
Hugs-RJ
She called the police when he shoved her as she tried to remove some stuff. They probably know him, already. She called again when he nailed the doors so she couldn't get in for her belongings today. She also promised me she'd call our local women's abuse organization, too. We've talked about the importance of having the record of these calls in case he tries to turn it around...he's like that. Nothing is ever his fault.
She's going to be ok and I'm keeping her close until she is.
What an awful situation to be in, especially with 4 kids! I had been with someone for 3 yrs, split for several, then we got back together. In the meantime, he became an alcoholic and began verbal abusing me, however, one time he put his hands around my neck and began to strangle me and that was it. I moved out on his ass while he was at work. Of course, I didn't have 4 kids.
What a blessing you are cherry, to help your friend in such dire circumstances. You are giving her a safe place to stay and have offered your friendship and love when she has no one else to turn to. I am sure she appreciates your generosity. Please let us know how things go, especially after one full day of having a house full of guests. lol
Hugs,
Carrie
Massive huggles! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
She found out that he'd installed surveillance cameras in the house so he saw her when she went in a window to get some stuff, yesterday. He made references to how she looked without saying how he knew.
This man is scum!!!!!
I thought I'd sleep a bit later since I was up late, but nope...wide awake and up at 1:45. I'm hurting pretty bad. I know this stress isn't the best thing for me, but my friend's situaton is worse. At least I have a house of my own and room to share.
Think like an asshole. You are now on this jerks radar as someone who is inbetween him and her so watch yourself and your back. Carry pepperspray, phone set to 911, and lock all doors. Tell neighbours to watch for this guy. Have a plan B. Your friend may have to go to a safe house where no one knows their whereabouts, but be ready for that at a moment's notice.
What a wonderful heart you have. I'm sending protective angels your way until he goes away.
you are so sweet to be there for her in this terrible time! love and prayers for protection.
Generosity brings us happiness so you're well on your way!
Good luck to all of you!
hugs,
Ama
xo