The Den Community Group
Pull up a chair and put your feet up. Lie down if necessary! :)
I know that not all of us are from estrangement groups but quite a few of us are. I wanted to share a recent experience that I had with my son.
I got an email from my son - my heart didn't jump - I merely opened and read it. It said I am thinking about you and I wanted to say "hi".
Love Brian.
I wrote back, without any emotional and said "Hi" I hope you and the kids are well.
Love, Mom.
He wrote back and said the kids and he were fine. The kids were doing well in socker and he and his wife were doing well in their jobs. I responded with a non-specific '"that's nice" and take care.
I really didn't much care who was doing what - and I don't feel a tug - if anything I'm a little irritated that he thinks he has the right to be thinking about me after what he did. He sort of gave up all rights to me as a mother and that included any fond feelings.....imo.
I want you to know that we can do this. There really does come a time that we have developed enough self-esteem that we just won't subject ourselves to the strings anymore. I know what would be there if I went back in - just more of the same. I will never be enough for my son, in his eyes and I have no desire to even try anymore. I just don't have it in me.
We are all good enough just as we are - they are not those sweet, little, big eyed darlings anymore. And the minute we start thinking of them in that manner - we need to walk the other way and get a grip.
Okay - y'all - we can do this. We really can.
Take care,
LJ
I got an email from my son - my heart didn't jump - I merely opened and read it. It said I am thinking about you and I wanted to say "hi".
Love Brian.
I wrote back, without any emotional and said "Hi" I hope you and the kids are well.
Love, Mom.
He wrote back and said the kids and he were fine. The kids were doing well in socker and he and his wife were doing well in their jobs. I responded with a non-specific '"that's nice" and take care.
I really didn't much care who was doing what - and I don't feel a tug - if anything I'm a little irritated that he thinks he has the right to be thinking about me after what he did. He sort of gave up all rights to me as a mother and that included any fond feelings.....imo.
I want you to know that we can do this. There really does come a time that we have developed enough self-esteem that we just won't subject ourselves to the strings anymore. I know what would be there if I went back in - just more of the same. I will never be enough for my son, in his eyes and I have no desire to even try anymore. I just don't have it in me.
We are all good enough just as we are - they are not those sweet, little, big eyed darlings anymore. And the minute we start thinking of them in that manner - we need to walk the other way and get a grip.
Okay - y'all - we can do this. We really can.
Take care,
LJ
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
Gotta' get a grip and get life back on track ... thanks for sharing LindaJean ... this really was right one time!
Hugs hon' ...no fun
glad to hear from you and that you are doing well!!
You're a survivor! Once we realize this.. we can indeed move forward. Sometimes it's a long, hard road to get there but YES WE CAN do this.! So very glad you were able to handle this without the setbacks that occurred in the past. Life is good on this side of the fence. Enjoy it !
I am proud of you. Hugs....
I know how hard this was to do.....becuz I had to do something similar the other day.
These EO just think they can treat us like crapola/abusive and then turn around and act like nothing is wrong. WTH????? They probably are testing the water to see what else they can do to us to try and destroy us. Sorry, but we are not some play toy for their amusement....we are real ppl with real feelings (I can't say the same about them).
I love that we will get the last laugh from the grave ( the little darlings are written out of the will). That just makes my doggie day :)
I have a personal letter for each of my EO and other nasty ppl that use to be in my life waiting to pounce on me like vultures when I'm gone.......I hope they choke on me!!!!! LOL
Guess you and I are getting stronger from every blow we have been served by our EO. They better watch out becuz they have no idea what they have done to us and the repercussions that await them in the reading of our wills. They have to be pretty stupid if they think we haven't protected ourselves!
OY!!!!!!
And kids need to learn it about their parents.
Some learn it easy, some learn it hard...and a few....may never learn it...
Hugs.
If we do get to look backwards after we leave I do hope we get to watch what happens when the wills are read.
There comes a time that you stop caring and I think a lot of us have reached that time.
How good to hear from you. You sound good. I found your post to be encouraging and hopeful. Yes we can do this and only those of us who go through it, know how hard it is. I am very proud of you and how happy I am for you to not walk back in so to speak.
You have come so far.
HS
Thanks for your positive feedback.
{{hugz}}