I have no confidence. I mean I have a friend or two. But I see the looks of the 'popular' skinny girls. I'm big and I know it and it kills me a little more everyday going in to school. Looking in the mirror or anything in general. I put on a happy face but inside I just want to curl up in a ball and be left alone. There are times I've come out and said to people in my family I'm not happy. That I feel I need help in some way. Just an ear to hear me is all. But I get told to stop being a drama queen. I don't know what depression or anxiety really mean. My brother has anxiety really badly and apparently that means there can be nothing even slightly wrong with me or I'm just looking for attention. I just need someone to hear me and not judge. Family is supposed to support eachother and I'm told if I feel like this at any time that I can talk to them. Yet when I do I'm put down.
I get sick a lot with my chest and throat and I always have since I was a baby. Yet once again I'm being told it's a cry for attention and that just makes me feel worse. My self-esteem, social anxiety and lack of motivation are hitting me more and more and I have no one to turn to anymore. I have brought it up to my family that I feel like they don't seem to care only to be laughed at and yelled at and given a massive lecture to. Is it just me or are there other people who feel this way?