Stress Management Support Group
Stress management defines stress as a person's physiological response to an external stimulus that triggers the "fight-or-flight" reaction.Stress can be overwhelming. This community is for best practices in stress management.
I have just left a weekly meeting, where it feels like my manager completely threw me under the bus over a client. There is a client that needs clean up, and I have been sharing what I have been directing to the team and how to get her feedback, taking her advice and implementing it. Then she has the nerve to say that it's too slow of a process and that there is a better way to do it in front of my boss.
I just said ok to avoid arguing, because it is unprofessional. But to be frank, I cannot begin to express how angry I am, hence my venting.
I have been told I have the tendency to go from 0 to 100, and it happens moreseo with this person than anyone. I am struggling with every fiber of my being to keep quiet and not speak of this to anyone, because I know it is unprofessional to express feelings, and I often feel like if I do people think I am making myself out to be the victim. So what's the point in telling anyone? It won't make me feel any better, it will make me dwell on more things to stress me out.
But since I am being honest.- I would like to scream my head off an lash out my anger at them. This person who has been known to put up a show, and I hate that I'm being looked at in a certain way. She's just a goddamn liar, exaggerator and betrayer. We are supposed to be on the same team, and she doesn't realize when she makes me look bad, it is a poor reflection upon her ability to manage. But I am furious, so furious that I need to find some way to express it and I can't.
Things like this increase my stress. It makes me feel like I am not doing my job, and I develop an attitude of incapability and lack of faith in myself. It makes it that much harder to do the job I need to do with a smile on my face and fake pleasantries when I feel rotten on this inside. I don't know what to do by breathe deep and hope it will pass.
Everyday is a criticism. I can do everything as I am told, and yet I am still met with some criticism. It is being sniffed out for no reason whatsoever.
I know first hand what this kind of stress, anger and tension can feel like. I truly believe that you can find a way to overcome this. The way life is experienced is often in two different layers. There is the external situation, this the environment around us, our relationships, job situations, living situations etc. On the most basic level, this is also what we experience with our senses and then alternatively there is the internal environment. These are our thoughts, emotions, feelings, and sensations that appear to us within our own bodies. Though it may seem difficult, it is within this internal environment in which you can free yourself of all this stress and tension.
How you may begin to do this, is by bringing awareness to the physiological sensations of stress and anger that arise within your body. You may experience this as a tightening within the chest, abdominals, or other places in the body, for example. You may also have an incredible amount of thought activity, in your case, perhaps these thoughts are centred around how unfair your manager is being and how unappreciated you may feel. You must also bring awareness to this inner voice within your head that rattles on about why whatever is happening, in the present moment, should not be happening. Once you bring awareness to the constant inner monologue within your head, an opening may occur, and you can begin to separate yourself from all of the activity both mental and physiological that arises within your inner hemisphere.
If you would like some help on how you can apply these practices in each moment. Feel free to privately message me.
If your boss says an approach is too slow then as you did say ok. Does she have something else she wants you to do?
The desired state in work for many is total logic as you say. So think of it less as critism and more like Vulcan problem solving
"This approach too slow" bosses job to make such conclusions
"Ok trying different way"everyone
Robot styleee
But if she's saying that in front of others and she's a nice person ask her to tell you that stuff one to one
If she's a cow but non abusive then you can always learn to train yourself not to think badly of yourself. Do the Vulcan logic thing
If she's abusive then hr might be an option, move offices Tec
If she's constantly criticising joke and say usually for v every negative thing you have to say to me you have to say five good things for us to stay friends
Na I know you can think up better
Are you actually doing your job without mistake and she's criticising you or do you need to ask for more training, or spend time thinking about what you have to learn
If your doing your job Ok she might have a personality disorder or something
If your boss is complaining that your getting stuff actually wrong then write comprehensive step by step notes and spend time figuring out what your doing after work sometime.
Learning a job is stressful
Working with negative people is stressful
So keep on venting and posting you'll get through