Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

591 Members
6,628 Posts
0 Online
Women's Health
/ Stillbirth Support Group

wrong to want another baby?

SophiasMom2010
SophiasMom2010
Hey ladies, as a lot of you know it's been about 1 1/2 years Since I lost Sophia, and it's been 2 months since the miscarriage happened and we quit ttc. However the desire to have another baby is still so strong, my life feels so empty and useless without my baby.

I'm unemployed, just trying to get through school and my BF's income barely supports us. In my mind I know we shouldn't have a kid when we're so young and broke and that it will be a strain on my time and education and that a new baby can't replace Sophia.

Having said all that, my heart is so broken still, all I want is a little baby to love and hold and to live for, I feel like my life stalled when Sophia died and I am still just waiting around to bring her home. I thought maybe it would go away but I still feel like I need this and all the logical reasons to not have kids can burn in hell.

Basically, do I sound nuts?? I know you guys understand but the desire for my rainbow is so strong despite everything else... help me out?
Love u all, hugs.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Your not nuts. :P hehe, I am the same way. Except I need to lose a lot of weight before I get pregnant again. I so want to have a another baby right now. And did TTC. but then we had an early MC. and now im going to focus on losing the weight and then try again. Its so frustrating sticking to this plan, even though I know its the healthy one and the right way to go for now. But I constantly think of having another baby and am so anxious for the day to come where we do get our BFP! That is actually a huge motivation for me to lose the weight. I am constantly thinking of myself healthy and pregnant and it makes me want to work out even more.

Im not sure what the right choice for you is to make. trust in yourself and believe that you will know when its time to ttc even if you feel you are not finically ready. Maybe things will work out better than you thought.
Jenderson
Jenderson
You are not at all wrong in how you are feeling and I believe that everything will work out for you. While I would hope that if you do decide to ttc right now, that it would happen fast for you, it may not. While you try, you can focus on school and finding a job (if you can while going to school too!) and just let all the pieces fall into place.

Here's to getting our rainbows when the time is right, whether the time is right by accident or because we make it right!
Hugs!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Of course you are not nuts, we all understand this strong desire. I do recall us posting about this topic bc you were not sure if your BF was on board and I was wondering if you guys have discussed it again lately and whether or not he is being supportive about ttc. I think that being on the same page about it either way will help you make the decision about when the time is right. Money is important for taking care of a child but its not a good enough reason to give up on motherhood.