Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

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Born Sleeping

LogansMum
LogansMum

Hi



My Son was stillborn a week ago & my Husband & I really don't know where to turn. We left the hospital with a stillbirth book in our hands & no help whatsoever. I am from the U.K but have lived in Canada for the past 4 years with my Husband.


I was 23 weeks pregnant when last Wednesday I had a slight show of blood in my usual discharge. This has been quite normal for me as I had a large fibroid on the outside of my uterus. I went to bed & couldn't get comfortable due to very mild cramping in my lower abdomen. I woke my husband at 6 Thursday morning & told him we needed to go to emergency as there was a bit more blood & my back was so painful I couldn't sit down. We was seen straight away. The baby was as active as ever on the screen & his heartbeat was perfect. The doctor said that he would have to do a internal to check for preterm labor but at 23 weeks it was very unlikely. He said my cervix was closed & I was good to go home. We'd not quite made it home when my waters broke. We turned straight back round calling the hospital on the way who told us to go straight up to maternity. Baby's heartbeat was still fine but I had such bad rectal pressure like I needed to go to the bathroom. Before I even got there my gynochologist showed up, took one look & said he was about to be born.


Logan John was born sleeping 15 minutes later weighing 1lb 1 ounce.


We spent 2 days with our son in the funeral home. I held him, told him how much we loved him & wrapped him in his own blanket before saying goodbye one last time. He was so perfect & looked just like his Daddy with perfect lips & the cutest little nose.


Logan was cremated on Monday and we brought him home yesterday to his beautiful nursery that his daddy only finished putting together last week. 


At 39 he was my first baby & a complete surprise. We called him our little miracle. Now we are completely lost. We have received no support off anyone. Not one single call from any medical professional. Nothing.


At my age I'm not sure if we would ever get that lucky again & even if we did with no answers as to why this happened could it happen again?


Thank you for taking the time to read this


Michelle

BabyV
BabyV
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my baby girl almost 1 year ago this December. I’ve been in your shoes and I want to let you know that the pain never goes away..... it takes time to heal but you never heal completely. May God Bless you and your husband
LogansMum
LogansMum
Thank you so much & so sorry you had to go through this too
all4tito
all4tito
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Please do not loose hope. I lost my boy too at 41 weeks on 29/06/17 . I am 40 however I am very hopeful and full of faith that I will have more children. Refuse to give up. Let the love of God fill your heart. Read Isaiah 53:4-6 and let it minister to you. I am currently reading a book called God's plan for pregnancy by Nerida Walker and it has helped me a lot. I am sorry you feel so alone. Please feel free to message me privately if you feel like pouring your heart out. I pray God's peace and comfort for you and your husband....Amen.
momatheart2715
momatheart2715
I lost my daughter on February 15,2017 at 40 weeks due to a knot in her cord. This pain is something no one should have to go through. You will find comfort here through talking to people. The biggest thing is make sure you and your husband communicate! It is so important. You both know what each other feel. Make sure you cry and embrace every emotion as it comes. You can do do it. I still have bad days. With the holidays it has been rough. Lots of crying. I read the book Noah’s Rainbow. I loved it. It gave me validation for the things I was feeling. For now, breathe and take it one day at a time.
Nur
Nur
Hi logansmum,

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my little girl at 23 weeks too, due to a nuchal cord accident, she was my fourth, after a misscarriage at 12weeks and two living boys. I am also 39. She was a dream, we were so happy, and now she’ll stay a dream. The pain is just unreal, but at the time someone said to me the grief is like you are drawning in the sea, the waves are huge at first and they come very fast. At this point you dont try to learn to swim, you only focus on breathing, surviving. With the time they’ll be as intense but more spaced, and one they you’ll learn to swim. Its been 4 months since I lost my girl, I am like normal most of the time, I can laugh, have a nice time with friends, and then sometimes theres this huge wave again, devastating, but you’ll make it through. You’ll never get over it, but you’ll learn to live with it and strange as it sounds, you’ll make a nice memory of it. Stay strong.