I'm glad you're finding support with your friends. It was years before I discovered that the lack of support I experienced from friends and family was, for the most part, them not knowing what to say so they said nothing, or the wrong thing. It turns out that they could see my pain and grief but were either uncomfortable with it or just unable to help, hence the silence. I hold no anger towards any of the people who upset me when I lost Jane, but at the time I did. I think it's great that you feel a bit better about the support you're getting. Sometimes all it takes is opening up a little and letting trusted people have a little glimpse of your world. Well done.

I also find that for the most part it's just that people don't know what to say or how to approach me. I find that if I break the silence and start talking about Emma first... it puts them at ease and they know it's ok to talk about then. Then they're comfortable enough to tell me that they're thinking about me and they start asking questions etc. It helps. I've told all my colleagues as well that talking about her helps me, it helps make her real so they ask a lot of questions and don't mind if I talk about her and about feelings I might be having.

I think thats really great, it feels good when people are supportive. I have been using facebook to post things we are doing to keep his memory alive, like when we had a memorial mass at church, when my daughter makes something special for the grave, the party were throwing for him on my baby shower date, etc. I get lots of positive messages and it makes me feel like hes not forgotten and many people have reached out and said theyve also lost a baby, and I would have never known. So many people dont say anything because it makes others feel awkward, but that just makes it more taboo and we shouldnt have to suffer in silence, we should be able to talk about our babies. I also wrote a letter to my families when I came back (Im a teacher) about what happened and I had two families write me beautiful letters back, one of which told me she had also lost a baby and it was so touching and wonderful. When I went back to work I also had coworkers come up and tell me they also lost a baby and understood, and it was good being understood and sad that it has happened to so many people I know, yet I never knew that about any of them. I think we need to raise more awareness and educate, people dont know what to say, how to say it, what to do, etc. Im glad people are being supportive of you as well and that its helping you!

That's wonderful. Good job in finding the strength to do that. Raising awareness is a great thing. These are all topics people don't speak much of and then when it happens you feel alone and have never heard of it before only to find out, it's not that uncommon and so many woman have suffered losses as well. You should feel proud you could share your story and raise awareness to people in public forum. The returned support is very helpful for you and your healing process as well. (hugs)

It just felt great to allow myself to express myself to others that do not know what we are going through. Although there are family and friends that are supportive, there's also ignorant ones that just want you to move on already and are tired of seeing and hearing us be depressed. There should be more awareness because I have had 3 perfectly healthy children and never in a million years did I think this would happen to my 4th, my precious Evelyn. It has been 23 years since I had my first daughter and you think that all pregnancies are supposed to be ok with some exceptions of complication. However, the thought of losing a baby is never thought of until it actually happens to you.