Stillbirth Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.
It has been a little over 3 weeks since we lost Gemma. Everyone knew I was pregnant. Everyone knows that she was stillborn. As if dealing with such a tremendous loss is not enough, we have to deal with other people's crap. We have had a group of friends for years. Of 6 couples, 1 has come to be with us. They all went together and sent a "gift" and all have texted or called, but they are avoiding us like the plague. We only had family at the funeral but even other friends and our coworkers have come to the house to spend time with us. It's like they don't want to see us cry or they don't want to be sad themselves so they don't bother. Don't get me wrong, some people have been great, but some of the friends we've had the longest are acting like this will just pass. It is so hard when people you care about don't acknowledge that she was really here or that she will forever be a part of our family. I don't think I can ever be around these people again and not feel angry at them.
I lost Carter at 38 weeks, on october 20, 2011.
i lost almost everyone :(
ALL of my husbands side, never (and STILL, almost a year later)contacted us to say ANYTHING. they never acknowledged. we have also lost countless friends.
it is maddening. My friends now consist for the most part, of the woman i meet here, and other sites where woman have gone through loss.
the problem is , if you have not gone through it, you just DONT GET IT.
You will find your way and what is right for you.
please try not to expect to much from people. I expected a lot, obviously to much, and got disapointed everytime.
I am so sorry for your loss
((hugs))
There's just one way to know- have you lost a child too?
You'll have another child-must I hear this each day?
Can I get another mother, too, if mine shall pass away?
Don't say it was God's will- that's not the God i know.
Would God on purpose break my heart, and then watch as my tears flow?
'"You have an angel in heaven- a precious child above.'"
But, tell me whom here on earth shall i give this love?
"Aren't you better yet? Is that what i heard you say?No!
A part of my heart aches each and every day - but it hurts me even more.
I want to talk about my child who has gone through death's door.
Don't say these things to me, although you do mean well.
They do not take my pain away; I must go through hell.
I will get better slow but sure- and it helps to have you near
But a simple "I'm sorry you lost your child" is all I need to hear.
By Gail Fasolo
http://anabelleluz.blogspot.com