Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

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/ Stillbirth Support Group

Back to crying myself to sleep

Marthar1201
Marthar1201
It has being 3 months since I lost Eli. It's hard knowing that I will never get to do anything with my son. All the things that i had planned and dreams that i had with my son will never take place. Everyday could had being a milestone for my baby boy....and i would never get to cherish that. I am back to crying and screaming like those first days. My har aches..... and this pain wint go away.... i want it to stop..... I cant i cant take it..... i wish this was a nightmare.... i wish this never had happened to me or any of you. No person in this life deserves this pain SPECIALLY A MOTHER! I miss my baby so much.. ..
Rochelle43
Rochelle43
I know so well the pain you are feeling. I have said it before..........my loss was some time ago.......but I still remember, and my heart aches for you. Only those of us who have walked the walk truly know. I'm so sorry you have to experience this. I do remember crying myself to sleep. I felt numb, and I walked around with a constant heaviness in my chest. At night I would just let those tears flow. Know that I am thinking of you and a big hug from me to you!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Thank you for sharing, that is exactly how I feel some days and nights. It is almost unbearable. When I feel that way, a lot of times I also hate myself, because I feel like I should have known something was wrong earlier. I lost my little Fiona less than 1 month ago at 35 weeks. My pregnancy was low risk, and uneventful until then. They don't know what happened; it did not appear to be a cord accident and they couldn't find anything wrong with her, but something made her heart stop beating. She is my second child. It is not fair for any parent to have to go through this. I have tremendous anger and guilt, because I just graduated nursing school and feel I should have recognized her decreased movement sooner. I should have been charting her kicks. I was foolish enough to think that this could never happen, in my situation, with a low risk, uneventful pregnancy. Now, I'm learning that it sadly happens far more frequently than I thought.
Marthar1201
Marthar1201
I am so sorry for your loss Becca... I feel exactly the same way... Never in my life I heard of the term Stillbirth/Stillborn. I had the perfect pregnancy everything was ready for my first born. His nursery..... he's car seat..... I MEAN EVERYTHING...... and I don't have him... I was 100% ready to be a first time mother....... and never in my life.... I imagine I would lose a baby..... it never cross my mind that something could go wrong during my pregnancy............ I miss my son Eli so much.... People keep telling me you are young, you can have more kids.... or the good thing you didn't get to attached to him. WHAT THE WORLD!!!!! Is my son I loved him even before I knew I was pregnant..... I hear you no parent should had to go through this horrible pain. My son hardly kicked.... but he did kicked from time to time... and I didn't know what was normal and what wasn't....since he was my first child.......
I will keep you in my prayers.... and hope God can help you find some peace in your heart. I will keep Fiona in my prayers too...
Hugs your way... and you are not alone.... we are all here to support each other