Step Families Support Group
Traditionally, a stepfamily is the family one acquires when a parent enters a new marriage, whether the parent was widowed or divorced. This community is focused on many of the relationships and issues that may arise within stepfamilies where you may find answers from some members and you may help other members with their questions.
I've been with my husband for 3 years, we've been married almost 2 years. His 2 daughters live with us full time, as does my daughter. We recently had a new baby together. The issue is, I really don't feel connected to my 2 step daughters. I feel a little resentful because he works a lot so their care is mostly on me. My daughter also seems really unhappy and annoyed by them. I don't feel like I love them at all. I basically tolerate them. Its hard because I don't get to focus attention on my own daughter as much as she needs and wants because these kids are very needy. Especially the little one, who has multiple behavior issues which I'm forced to deal with on my own most of the time.
Anyway, guess I'm just trying to reach out and see if anyone else feels like this. All I ever hear is how these step moms "adore" their step children, and I just don't.
I appreciate your honesty- I dated a lady with 3 kids exclusively for 6 months; THe two oldest were "top-notch"; the third was a psycho (13, and already been "given a pass" on 5 violent felonies because his "daddy walked out" when he was 5)
You don't marry just the spouse, you marry the family. I pray you are composed, and mature, and there is possibility of more "help" from your exes; unless he is "brain dead" your husband must sense your resentment of his two daughters, sadly, would you say possibly you "married him before you knew the difficult" step daughters? I am saddest for your new baby- no offense, but this is a hostile environment and with challenges kids face today in public schools, etc., can this POSSIBLY be "shielded" from the precious new life?
I wish you all the best- my peers with a step parent had the "full range" from "just like my real mom or dad to" "they suck"- but none were abused, or neglected. NOT THAT YOU ARE- but it took two men and two women to produce the 3 daughters, WHERE ARE THEy in this- sounds like you are being "dumped on"
God help you
jm
What’s Love Got To Do With It? What To Do When You’re A Stepmother Who Doesn’t Love Her Stepchildren
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/mary-t-kelly-ma/whats-love-got-to-do-with_2_b_2156663.html
'You Don't Have to Love Your Stepchildren,' Says An Expert, 'Just Be a Good Parent'
http://people.com/archive/you-dont-have-to-love-your-stepchildren-says-an-expert-just-be-a-good-parent-vol-9-no-13/