I can relate, and feel very guilty because it does come off as rejection. I’m not sexually attracted to women and as my spouse continues to feminine their body it’s such a turn off. Not sure sure how to navigate through this and right now there’s no intimacy whatsoever. It can be lonely at times.

I can relate big time after my ex came out and told me I didn't feel at all attracted to them and certainly didn't want sex/ intimacy. I know I am attracted to men and I did not feel I could stay in the relationship we did stay together for 6 years but now we are separated. Take some time to understand how you feel and what you want in life ...stay safe and happy .

Yes. And I think it's an emotional thing for me. Like, it doesn't matter what my ex will/will not do now, the whole situation and their behavior towards me was terrible--and that's not very attractive.

Yup. I hear you.
Being attracted to women is different than remaining attracted to your spouse as they transition from MTF. It's a lot of change, and if you are not welcoming the changes, its' really hard to be excited.
It's such a sensory thing. I have no interest in feeling the changes to their body and am not into the different smells.

I can't stand the smooth legs. Smoother than mine!

Cora, that was me. I don't know. I may have, eventually, been able to get past the transition and feel some sort of attraction to my ex again. However, after the lies and the deception, I just couldn't trust her. The emotional bond was broken beyond repair, and I NEED that emotional bond in order to feel that physical attraction.

We had started to lose intimacy before I was told about the gender dysphoria, I think because of menopausal symptoms I was having (the usual - dryness, weight gain).
After the gender dysphoria revelation we did become more intimate for a time but I ended up feeling 'off' about it. In the end I realised because it wasn't because he wanted to have sex with me but the feeling I had that he was imagining himself being me during sex. It was like I wasn't really there. Sounds weird but that's how it seems to me - I read somewhere the description of being a 'flesh puppet', which made me laugh but also hit home!

1newstart I am totally with you... my husband revealed he was transgender 20 months ago - then everything seemed to settle and he was happy with “himself” we were both in therapy for a while and were working toward regaining trust and intimacy... until yesterday - when I found his prescriptions for HRT. Now I’m just so broken and done - not sure I will ever trust him about anything

AshnEmber & 1newstart, I can completely relate to how you feel. My spouse has hidden so much over the last few years, telling me one thing then doing another. About 8 months ago or so he upped his estrogen dosage claiming he didn’t notice it on the new prescription his doctor gave him. WTF...who doesn’t look at the drugs their doctor gives them? A couple of months after that, I come across some progesterone that he didn’t tell me he was taking. This is my marriage the last five years....he didn’t tell me when he started hrt until after he was on it...didn’t tell me he was seeing a therapist...didn’t tell me he signed up for a transgender workshop...and so it goes on and on. He tells me he’s going to be honest and every single time I find something. I don’t trust him and I don’t think I’ll ever gain that trust back. I’m tired of this merry go round...I’m going to have to get off at some point.

Me too InaQuandary

I just found out that my spouse is a cross dresser and has been one for life! I am so shocked and feel like an utter fool. He said he wants to cross dress more and desires more out of it. I am unbelievably devastated and don’t know what to do. I don’t think we can afford to live apart. Does anyone still live with their spouse as roommates(sex is way off the table for me, I told him I’m not into girls) and how do you deal with this for the sake of your children? He is going to a transformation class on how to act more feminine and I hate the freaky shaved legs which are new. I’m in hell.

Sabel I’m so sorry you are going through this - I can completely empathize. My kids were 9 when I found out about my husbands TG. They still don’t know and we are still “together” (living under one roof) - they are 11 now. As he lied and hid the fact that he started HRT (I found out the week after he started) we’ve just made the decision for him to sleep in a separate room. We haven’t talked with our kids about it at all yet but I’m anticipating we will need to soon.

All I can say is get some support as soon as you can! This is such a shock when it comes out of the blue... by support I mean at least one close friend or family member to support you and be comfortable with not disclosing his secret if he doesn’t want it disclosed (I negotiated this with my husband right away as I knew I needed that) but also counselling - both for you (and him if he doesn’t already have it) AND you both together if you want to try to stay together - there is no rush to make a decision on that topic - take your time so you are ready for whatever path you choose...

Sending you huge virtual hugs

Thank you I’m trying to cope.