Spouses of Sexual Addicts. Community Group

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chrissym59 03/21/2009

I also posted this at the Sex/Porn Addiction support group.

I've been packing since last weekend. I didn't realize how hard this would be. Almost everything is a constant reminder of the last 15 years. I'm trying to stay strong but the weak moments seem to consume me for a while. I just can't believe he is throwing all of this away. I will be moved into my sisters house by Thursday - the day he is due home from California. I have to believe that I'm doing the right thing. I need to move on and I'm trying hard to accomplish that. Thanks to those here who have given me suggestions, insight, support, encouragement and most of all hope. I know better days are coming and I'm looking forward to them!

Thriver 03/21/2009

I'm glad you have made a decision. Being in limbo is very tiring.
Just let yourself feel whatever you feel. It is going to hit you in layers, and you will feel better, then worse, then better. One day down the road you will realize you have gotten over the hump and while the pain is not gone, it is no longer threatening to overpower you.
It's hard not to revert to denial and say, I can't believe he is doing this, it is so wrong, so illogical, so tragic....and then begin to hope that he will see that as well.
Better days are coming!

deleted_user 03/21/2009

Wishing you well with the transition. Although you will have left the problem, the problems often follow us emotionally, so i recommend you keep up the therapy.
Look after you, and let us know how your going.
All the best

deleted_user 03/22/2009

I'm inspired with your strength.

Learningskills 03/22/2009

Good for you. You WILL get over it. I know. I divorced one and I surely did get over it completely. Other than I have a distinct dislike for immoral turds! Ha! Focus on your future and don't look back at him. He has his own life to live. You have yours. Take good care of yourself. Do some fun things even if you don't really feel like it.

deleted_user 03/23/2009

Good for you...you need to keep reminding yourself of how worthy you are of happiness. I did this very same move its been almost 7 weeks ago. I can tell you that I have risen up and there were some bad, bad days but today I live in complete peace with my decision. I am no longer a baby sitter of an adult man. Am I worried he is back to his old ways? I was for a time but now I realize I can only take care of me and myself and not make someone do something they didn't want to do.

I know he will do whatever he feels he needs to be doing for himself in his life and what he feels is morally right. I would not and cannot ever accept what he was doing and he is the one that broke up and disrespected our marriage. Enough is enough... may you feel the peace I'm feeling sooner. It was all worth it... walking away was very worth it...

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